If you had told me 25 years ago that one day I'd be researching Mariah Carey for an article on Sonic Youth, I'd have some questions. I certainly did in August 2002, a bit confused when Kim started infusing her "Kool Thing" monolog with references to "Sister Mariah". The first occurrence may have been on August 14th in Montreal - three days earlier in New York she was still doing her old rap about things never being ideal. In San Francisco she said "you gotta help poor Sister Mariah...you know, first she like, feels compelled to wear almost nothing, in order to raise her record sales, and now those guys are telling her she's gotta redo her image, put on more clothes. You know, that's just not right! But...I guess, we can still be friends." In Vancouver: "I mean, look at Sister Mariah. You know, one minute they got the poor girl so, like, um, so afraid she's not gonna sell any records unless she wears the skimpiest clothes she can find. And then...wait, wait! And then, they turn around, and they say 'Hey, a girl with your voice, you need a makeover, you should be wearing more clothes!'. Well, no matter what she does I doubt if they're going to let her sell her CDs for $7.99 at the store, which is what you should be paying...but I just want you to know, that we can still be friends!" The song didn't surface again until November, at which point she was solely focused on the price of CDs. Rest assured, her mind was still on Sister Mariah, and just a few months later Sonic Youth unveiled a brand new song on their February 2003 Japan tour, with the extravagant title "Mariah Carey and the Arthur Doyle Hand Cream". (Kim introduced it as "Lotion" but Thurston corrected her.)

They opened every encore on that tour with the new tune, and it was one side of a split 7" single with Erase Errata on Narnack Records, which dropped in April ahead of their appearance at Coachella. The cover art featured a tracing of a photo of Mariah from the back of her 1999 album Rainbow, and the liner notes make further reference to her (Erase Errata's track "Glitter" is also a callback to Mariah's ill-fated 2001 film). They proceeded to play the song at every single show in 2003, including their taping for PBS Soundstage (not chosen for broadcast but available here). It was a fun, upbeat Kim rocker that spiced up the Murray Street tour set. For a while it just existed on that 7" and in the memories of those fortunate enough to see them in 2003, but when Sonic Nurse was announced in 2004 they revealed that the song would be included, with a twist. The title was flagged as being a potential legal hazard so they replaced "Mariah Carey" with another 5-octave wonder: Kim Gordon. The lyric, itself particularly scathing, remained intact.

About that lyric. Mariah Carey was not on my radar in any way so as I said, when Kim started referring to her during "Kool Thing" I was very puzzled. From what I can gather, she reached a point of exhaustion circa July 2001 during promotion for Glitter and collapsed, leading to her being hospitalized for fatigue. Described at the time as "an emotional and physical breakdown", the result of the non-stop pace of juggling video shoots, recording sessions, and a packed publicity schedule. She shared a series of distressed voice messages on her website, supposedly on the day of her breakdown, leading to further rumors. Ultimately she took some time off, returning in December 2002 with her ninth album Charmbracelet, which she promoted with an appearance on Larry King Live. I suspect that the band saw this December 2002 interview and used it as inspiration for the lyrics to "Mariah Carey and the Arthur Doyle Hand Cream", which were written line-by-line as a group. The lyrics reference many topics discussed in the interview, including the fabled breakdown and rumored relationship with Eminem. She confirmed that she was named after the song "They Called The Wind Mariah", which is also worked into a verse. (The hand cream was an actual gift received from saxophonist Arthur Doyle, unrelated to the lyric.)

It still strikes me as an odd target for Sonic Youth, tackled without the reverence given to other artists like Karen Carpenter or Madonna. I don't listen to her music, but Mariah seems to be a legitimate songwriter with a powerful voice who pushed herself too hard and never said no, and it caught up with her. I guess they saw a different side to it. In Goodbye 20th Century, Kim refers to Carey's "overwhelming, psychotic desire to please" as the source of her fascination. Fair enough! The song remained a highlight of Nurse tour set lists all through 2004, and made it halfway through 2005, played for the last time on June 3rd at the Art Rock Festival in France. Despite the legally enforced rebranding, the song always remained "Mariah" on set lists and was introduced as such. (Okay, one exception.)

As a song, it's pretty damn weird. Like "The Empty Page", Lee turns up on backing vocals, singing the chorus with Kim. It reminds me a lot of "Plastic Sun", particularly Kim's approach to her guitar part. For "Mariah" she started using a slide, and basically just does a backwards slide during the verses, and stays silent during the chorus. This leads to some confusion as to what her tuning actually is: all early set lists indicate the "Peace Jr" Les Paul guitar was used, which she played on "Sympathy for the Strawberry". It was tuned EEBBF#F#. However, the PBS Soundstage version shows her using the Ibanez Talman, which she had just used for "Plastic Sun" - that was tuned to EBEGGB. "Strawberry" came next, so the Les Paul was right there, but she still used the Ibanez. I have a feeling she may have switched back and forth, at least until August 2004 when she started playing the red Jaguar, in what sounds like EEBBF#F# if the above video is any indication. She may have even started using EBF# for "Plastic Sun", indicating that the tunings are at least somewhat arbitrary. That being said, I can't be 100% sure what she used on the record. (By the way, EEBBF#F# ended up being the tuning I figure Lee may have used for Made in USA!)

There's all kinds of stuff going on with this song - I think they recorded it in a very early stage, Lee is still tentatively playing notes during the early choruses rather than the full blast chord approach he'd take live. I swear his guitar in the verse has low F# notes in it, or is somehow different from what he's playing live, but I can't make it out. I'm also sure there's another guitar that isn't part of the live representation - it almost sounds like it could be Kim, playing a little arpeggio just before her slides in the verse. If not Kim, it's somebody overdubbing an extra little bit (I've just included it in her part for fun). Thurston's part is big time weird, you kinda have to watch a live version to get a feel for the way he attacks the verses. They all combine to make some pretty ugly chords! Please send me any comments or corrections. We're sticking to the Murray Street era next week, with another twist. By the way, whether "Mariah Carey" or "Kim Gordon and the Arthur Doyle Hand Cream", it may not be the longest title in this set! (And just for the record, the 7" says "Handcream" but come on...)

A SECTION				00:00-00:06

Thurston:

D-----------------*7*--------------------------*7*--------
C----------*7*-------*7*-----------------*7*------*7*-----  etc.. each break is slightly different
G-------------*7*-------*7*----------*7*-----*7*-----*7*--    but always 7th fret harmonics
D------*7*------------------*7*------*7*------------------
G--*7*----------------------*7*---------------------------
C--*7*----------------------------------------------------

Lee plays similar random harmonic figures across the 7th fret.

Kim doesn't play during the harmonic section.

Jim doesn't play during the harmonic breaks on the record, but during live versions he would just
make distorted pick scrape noise.

B SECTION				00:06-00:34

Thurston:

D--------------------------------------------------------
C-------------------13~~~ w/ bar ------------------------ 
G--------------------------------------------------------
D------------------------------------------11~~~ w/ bar--
G--11--11--11-11-11--------------------------------------
C---0---0---0--0--0-------13--13--13-13-13---------------

These are the notes to "punch" but he mutes strings and adds open strings while strumming in a really
quick, aggressive pattern, so watch a live version for a good guide.

On the record, it sounds like he sometimes turns on his MXR Phase 90 when he hits the 2nd and 4th notes 
of the riff.

Lee's part on the album is confusing to me because it really sounds like he's playing low F#s.
During live versions he kept his part pretty consistent, scraping the open G strings with the side of 
his pick then sliding into either an F# or C#. He uses more distortion during live versions than he does 
on the record, where his part kind of clangs together.

A----------------------------------
G----------------------------------
G----------------------------------
D----------------------------------
G---0-----11~~~/----0------6~~~~/--
G---0---------------0--------------

Kim plays a noisy descending burst with her slide. There is a guitar in her "space" playing an 
arpeggiation that isn't performed live, I don't know if it's her or not. I've tabbed it for fun. 
I also don't know if she's using EBEGGB or EEBBF#F# but it doesn't actually make a difference
for the slide noise.

F#------8-------8-----      ----------------
F#----7---7---7---7---      ---X\\\\\\\\\---
B---7-------7---------      ---X\\\\\\\\\---
B---------------------      ---X\\\\\\\\\---
E---------------------      ---X\\\\\\\\\---
E---------------------      ----------------

She runs a slide backwards from high up the neck while picking, over the 3rd and 4th "chords".

Jim:

G-----------------------------------------------------
D-----------------------------------------------------
A--------------9--9-9-9-9-10-10-10-10-12-7--7-7-7-7---
E---8--8-8-8-8----------------------------------------

C SECTION				00:34-00:48

Thurston:

D-----------------------------------------------------------------------
C-----------------------------------------------------------------------
G-----------------------------------------------------------------------
D--------------------------------------------12-12-12------7--7-7-7-5---
G---7-7-7-7-5-5-5-5-2--2-2-4-2-2-4-2--10-10--10-10-10--5-5-5--5-5-5-3---
C---7-7-7-7-5-5-5-5-2--2-2-2-2-2-2-2--10-10--10-10-10--5-5-5--5-5-5-3---

Lee plays some single-note figures on the album for the first couple of choruses, but live he always
went to straight to chords:

A---------------------------                                -----------
G---12--10---7----3-----5---                                -----------
G---12--10---7----3-----5---                                ---5---7---
D---12--10---7----3-----5---   optional hammer on notes:    ---5---7---
G---12--10---7----3-----5---                                ---3---5---
G---12--10---7----3-----5---                                ---3---5---

On the record, he plays this clean:

A-----------------------------------
G-----------------------------------
G---12---10------------------------- x 2
D--------------12------8~--8\10~~---
G-----------------------------------
G-----------------------------------

Kim doesn't play during the chorus.

Jim:

G---------------------------------------------------------------
D---------------------------------------------------------------
A----------------------5--5-5-5-5--1--1-1-1-1-1-----------------
E---3--3--3-3-3-1--1-1--------------------------1-1-1-1-1-1-1---

He "rocks" it up a bit with quick hammer-ons and general bass tricks, but for the most part just
sticks to the root.

A SECTION				00:48-00:51

B SECTION				00:51-01:20

C SECTION				01:20-01:34

This time Lee plays similar single notes but with lead distortion.

A SECTION				01:34-01:37

B SECTION				01:37-02:05

C SECTION				02:05-02:19

This time Lee plays chords but with exaggerated slides after some of them.

A SECTION				02:19-02:23

B SECTION				02:23-02:51

C SECTION				02:51-04:08

This time Lee starts with chords but quickly devolves into an improvised mess. During live
versions he would break out a slide and go wild til the end.

Kim comes in at 3:05 making aggressive slide noise til the end of the song.

D SECTION				04:08-04:51

Thurston makes distorted noise til the end.

Lee plays the melody til the end:

A-------------------------------
G-------------------------------
G---12---14---15---17--19br~~~-- repeat w/ delay
D-------------------------------
G-------------------------------
G-------------------------------

Kim makes distorted noise til the end.

Jim probably makes distorted noise til the end.


During live versions, they would just stick to the G chord (first chord of the chorus) for
a bar or two and stop cold, rather than doing the total meltdown.

text + tab by Chris Lawrence