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Old 09.09.2006, 10:26 AM   #21
Gulasch Noir
the end of the ugly
 
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Dear Pook,
i want to convince my girlfriend of the benefits of anal sex. Now you are an experienced man. What should I do/say?
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:26 AM   #22
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dear pookie,

i am a real cunt to everyone but in my heart i love every single person dearly. i have problems expresing this. what sould i do?

van morrison, your mums bed.
__________________
Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing

|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration
V

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/ \


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Old 09.09.2006, 10:30 AM   #23
Gulasch Noir
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Quote:
Originally Posted by space_monkey
dragi pookie i have a problem!

vec dosta dugo nemam curu,nikako nemogu naći ,u depresiji sam ,sta da radim? niko me neće ,zar sam ružan??
pozdrav ! ! ! you must understand that

Croatia has the most wonderful women I have seen. And with wonderful I mean great "balcony". My girlfriend concurs.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:30 AM   #24
Everyneurotic
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hey pookie,

all these years i'm startin' to feel loneley, so i was wondering if it was time to reveal myself to the public again. i want to end those myths about me dying in the can.

shake it baby!

elvis "a picture of me with bigfoot gets you $15 000" presley
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:33 AM   #25
space_monkey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gulasch Noir
Croatia has the most wonderful women I have seen. And with wonderful I mean great "balcony". My girlfriend concurs.
danke schoene ,everybody says that croatian are the most beuthiful girl ..maybe... but i saw fucking good italian girls ,,fuck they are wonderful...but stupid!
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:34 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hassan "butch" al-akrut
dear pookie,

i have little to no will power; in fact, i can't gather the energies i need to go to the can whenever nature calls. so my question is, should i buy a can of onion soup to piss while watching the telly?

hassan "butch" al-akrut.

cheesequake, new jersey.

Get yourself an Edgar Allan

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bono
Dear Pookie,

I REFUSE TO DIE. Should I do a duet with Robbie Williams?

Yours,

Bono, in space. That's right, space, that's how rich I am, pauper.

You should, because he also refuses to die.

Quote:
dragi pookie i have a problem!

vec dosta dugo nemam curu,nikako nemogu naći ,u depresiji sam ,sta da radim? niko me neće ,zar sam ružan??
pozdrav ! ! ! you must understand that

I do, I do. You're not alone.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:36 AM   #27
porkmarras
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Quote:
Originally Posted by space_monkey
danke schoene ,everybody says that croatian are the most beuthiful girl ..maybe... but i saw fucking good italian girls ,,fuck they are wonderful...but stupid!
What,because perhaps they shunned you?
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:37 AM   #28
porkmarras
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Dear Pookie,
I haven't decided about my tipple of choice tonight.Any advice?

Regards

Lulu De La Fayette
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:40 AM   #29
Glice
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Dear Pookie.

I'm terribly shy. What's the best way to pursuade Moustachioed Germans to suck my dong in a public toilet?

Yours,

Peter Palimpsest.
__________________
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage Clone
Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:42 AM   #30
fishmonkey
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Dear Pookie..

10 years ago my husband left me and 5 years ago the kids melted, i've started dating a 48 stone trucker called "Big Al" who spends a lot of time on the road. He swears to me he's true but why do i feel so blue? How can i keep the man when my vagina is drooping about 2 inches from the floor at all times?

Mrs Baggy Box
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:42 AM   #31
Pookie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gulasch Noir
Dear Pook,
i want to convince my girlfriend of the benefits of anal sex. Now you are an experienced man. What should I do/say?

Sorry, you've entered the wrong website, you need:

www.sexinchrist.com

Quote:
Originally Posted by Van Morrison
dear pookie,

i am a real cunt to everyone but in my heart i love every single person dearly. i have problems expresing this. what sould i do?

van morrison, your mums bed.

Don't worry, everybody knows you're a real cunt, you express it very well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by elvis
hey pookie,

all these years i'm startin' to feel loneley, so i was wondering if it was time to reveal myself to the public again. i want to end those myths about me dying in the can.

shake it baby!

elvis "a picture of me with bigfoot gets you $15 000" presley

Yes, but come back as cool young elvis please. And be warned:

 
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:44 AM   #32
Everyneurotic
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dear pookie,

i have a poisonous snake and fat greasy men fetish, but last time my 400 pound boyfriend, our pet cobra sparkle and me tried to make sweet sweet love, i just couldn't get it up. do you think it has anything to do with the 68 snake bites i have received in my willy and what should i do?

conrad "skinny" ries-myers.

slough
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:48 AM   #33
Pookie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lulu De La Fayette
Dear Pookie,
I haven't decided about my nipple of choice tonight.Any advice?

Regards

Lulu De La Fayette

Try this one:

 


Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter Palimpsest
Dear Pookie.

I'm terribly shy. What's the best way to pursuade Moustachioed Germans to suck my dong in a public toilet?

Yours,

Peter Palimpsest.

Try and stop them.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:48 AM   #34
Gulasch Noir
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Dir Pookie, i have a preference for that kind of fellatio pictures, where the fellatricis nose is held by the guy. Is this yet normal?

Gulasch Noir
Vienna
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:49 AM   #35
jon boy
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dear pookie,

i have terrible water retention in my ankles, is this due to the menapause?

margaret swathord, hampshire.
__________________
Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing

|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration
V

_ \ / _
PING <-------- moments later
/ \


http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhxq...isruo1_500.gif




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Old 09.09.2006, 10:51 AM   #36
nicfit
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Dear pookie....oh,sorry i wanted to drop a line to poochie!
 


p.s. are you his punk brother?


erwina dementia
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:53 AM   #37
Pookie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs Baggy Box
Dear Pookie..

10 years ago my husband left me and 5 years ago the kids melted, i've started dating a 48 stone trucker called "Big Al" who spends a lot of time on the road. He swears to me he's true but why do i feel so blue? How can i keep the man when my vagina is drooping about 2 inches from the floor at all times?

Mrs Baggy Box

That shouldn't be a problem if his name is anything to go by.

Quote:
Originally Posted by conrad "skinny" ries-myers
dear pookie,

i have a poisonous snake and fat greasy men fetish, but last time my 400 pound boyfriend, our pet cobra sparkle and me tried to make sweet sweet love, i just couldn't get it up. do you think it has anything to do with the 68 bites i have received in my willy and what should i do?

conrad "skinny" ries-myers.

slough

Tell your boyfriend to stop biting your willy.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:55 AM   #38
Glice
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Dear Pookie,

I'm afraid of the sun! Why is it such a cunt? Tell it to fuck off. The fucking bastard.

Graham Nascent.
__________________
Message boards are the last vestige of the spent masturbator, still intent on wasting time in some neg-heroic fashion. Be damned all who sail here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Savage Clone
Last time I was in Chicago I spent an hour in a Nazi submarine with a banjo player.
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Old 09.09.2006, 10:56 AM   #39
porkmarras
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Dear Pookie,
I have a small willy and the doctor told me that it wont grow any bigger either.I'm 45 years old and have been waiting for some miracles to happen for years to no avail.The choice of remedies is varied but they don't seem to work for me so i'm contemplating the idea of having plastic surgery to have it replaced.Any good words for me?

Yours

Barbarous Zappa

Bora Bora
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Old 09.09.2006, 11:00 AM   #40
Everyneurotic
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dear pookie,

i'm an existentialist and i have read the works of the greats and the more obscure thinkers, yet i'm still feeling a little empty on the subject; i've had many a sleepless night trying to figure it out but i just can't stop thinking about it.

so, i ask you, twizzlers or red vines?

ferdinand "barney" chernovetzky.

st. petersburg, russia.
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