[Kloriel]

Hello.

Soon I will tell a story. First though, I must go into another room and take care of some things. Also, there is a vicious storm right now that will probably destroy my electric ability. Which means I should probably stop typing this useless introduction and get to my other room requirements and then back to this portal before the hail lashes away my flesh.

We'll see what happens then, I guess.

Your Friend

Kloriel

p.s. feel free to respond to this even if you (understandably) feel like you could never match la poste des Klorinations. If nothing else, your snot text will make my gleaming proclamation easier to find when i return from the other rooms.

[total-trash]

it's storming here too

[floatingslowly]

Originally Posted by Kloriel

Also, there is a vicious storm right now that will probably destroy my electric ability.

invest in more electrodes.

 

[Kloriel]

I'm back. I just got off the transcribbler with my scinancial advisior and have indeed pushed forward the electrodes.

meanwhile

we'll open this episode with some trivia.
name the human collective that spat the following lyrics and win a starred out shamanistic role of harmony in the upcoming saga.

the lyrics you should shoot your minds out at include and are most certainly limited to:

'I wanna fire a gun - show me
I wanna be unseen - show me
A deep disguise
A deep disguise

Five years of nothing good
Still screaming
Shout this secrets out
Deep, distant and pure
Deep, distant and pure
Kill rhythm

Deep feelings, I'm keeping, still dreaming
Now, my secrets out
Deep, distant and pure'


hit up the keyboards avec les tableaus gorges

[pbradley]

Originally Posted by Kloriel

electric ability

This should be a band name.

[Kloriel]

As a followup, it may be worth noting, I actually hate shamans and really could do without one having anything to do with the upcoming night's response. But i'm not really in control of that anymore am I?

It is within your reach to thwart my plans and alter the course of
my dog just fucking farted and it smells really fucking bad. like all of a sudden seven skunky ass glands are tacked around the corners of these walls.

[pbradley]

This is why I prefer cats. Enjoy your dog fart.

[Kloriel]

yeah i will enjoy this cloud. meanwhile i hope you enjoy your lack of a defender when a bunch of criminals break into your place and steal all of your important shit. unless you have one of those pussies that can just fucking reach with its stream and melt the faces of no less than five interlopers, then -
you are neo.

[floatingslowly]

if the storm's on top of you, the electrodes will come too late. reanimated flesh requires immediate voltage. I'm afraid you'll have to dig more graves.

Originally Posted by Kloriel

As a followup, it may be worth noting, I actually hate shamans and really could do without one having anything to do with the upcoming night's response. But i'm not really in control of that anymore am I?

that depends. are there devils about? I could run and put on my suit.

 

(I'll have you know, this picture of a Russian shaman and small child is my favorite picture in the entire multiverse. tread lightly.)

[floatingslowly]

Originally Posted by pbradley

This is why I prefer cats. Enjoy your dog fart.

quoted for truth.

[Kloriel]

I'm about to address my dog's ass misselling situation, and I promise that if I walk out my door and see the above creature I WILL invite you inside for some dramamine (i'm out of beer) and interview you onfuckingair on the Saturday Night Klortoons show.


Do your worst (best)

[floatingslowly]

I suspect that yr dog is demonically possesed.

The only way to purge a demon is to cast it out the window.

Originally Posted by The Devil

Daniel Johnston was right.

[Kloriel]

Originally Posted by floatingslowly

The only way to purge a demon is to cast it out the window.

Alright, now what? He's at the door with perked ears and a wagging tail...

[pbradley]

Originally Posted by Kloriel

yeah i will enjoy this cloud. meanwhile i hope you enjoy your lack of a defender when a bunch of criminals break into your place and steal all of your important shit. unless you have one of those pussies that can just fucking reach with its stream and melt the faces of no less than five interlopers, then -
you are neo.

I live in a dense neighborhood (see San Francisco) in a dense apartment building.

Robbing my place is nearly impossible.

[Kloriel]

I don't really understand why you think living in a stupid town and in a building with stupid people makes you immune to the wily ways of leo and raph.

[floatingslowly]

Originally Posted by Kloriel

Alright, now what? He's at the door with perked ears and a wagging tail...

sprinkle sea salt across yr threshold and burn some sage (a shotgun is also optional).

now begin incanting the theme song of Saturday Night Klortoons.

have you ever noticed yr dog masturbating with a crucifix?

[Kloriel]

I don't have sage. By shotgun do you mean, burn the shotgun? I can do that. I'll be back in less than an hour. I need to go to Jed's house and get one his old blasters. Meanwhile, the lot of you can figure the fuck out what the theme song to this night's show is, i've already given you the first verse and an opportunity to star in the upcoming saga.

As for that third sentence...
uh, no.

[floatingslowly]

Originally Posted by Kloriel

Meanwhile, the lot of you can figure the fuck out what the theme song to this night's show is, i've already given you the first verse and an opportunity to star in the upcoming saga.

I know the answer. I googled it. it just wouldn't be really fair to say I knew.

you better make the bastards prove their love to Catherine Wheel before you accept them as yr star.

oops. my bad.

[Kloriel]

Alright. Give me like ten mins.

Soon the saga will eat some dirt and chew until Kasheek undergoes a baby boom.

[Kloriel]

Unfortunately there is nothing star wars about the following text. It was delivered to me by mail with no really legible return address. I have no idea who the person is that sent the box, but it contained a stack of letters. Most of them were disjointed scenes that didn't really flow together, and while some of the characters seemed to be in common from one tale to the next, the plot, setting, and everything else, was totally off.