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10.07.2009, 07:27 AM
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#81 | |
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haha!
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10.07.2009, 07:29 AM
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#82 | |
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kind of. I've gone without it so long I'm kind of not.. into us.. at the moment. I think we're just drifting. When I was filling out those forms there was one asking me to rate how often I've felt _____ in the last year or months or something... and when I looked at my answers at the end, well.. no wonder I keep on thinking about us breaking up. It was like.. (out of 10 ) sad 8 angry 7 anxious 8 happy 3 hopeful 2 fulfilled 3 etc
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10.07.2009, 07:31 AM
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#83 | |
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I think you can only really find out about someone's personality when you have met the person you've been chatting to online, especially if it's for more than once. Or at least you chatted to them regularly enough to get an idea of who they are, even though I'm sceptical that on a dating site it's often possible to tell for sure. I think it is possible, just not most of the time. Looks are the first thing that most people notice first, and some pictures can be really deceiving on a lot of these sites. In the gay ones many guys even go down the route of describing their size/body hair/presence of beard/piercings/scars etc. Then, yes, they'll also write down that they are looking for Mr Right or someone to get closer to. Still looks are what the majority of people go for. I imagine that to be the same for straight dating sites too. |
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10.07.2009, 07:33 AM
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#84 | |
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saying that, my sex drive is still totally there. I'm just craving something new. Even trying to have sex lately I just end up getting mad and thinking/talking about annoying stuff/fights and if it gets any further I'm just fucking bored and can't get into it.
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10.07.2009, 07:35 AM
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#85 | |
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I did that to the guy I'm with now, about 6 years ago. Maybe you'll hook up again some day. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be and that was all she could say to move on. Don't let the way it ended blow your mind over time and make you think it's better than it really was though. (I think this is what is partly to blame in my current rlsp problems)
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10.07.2009, 07:36 AM
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#86 | |
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I dunno, I've already beat a dead horse regarding this. She says she 'can't get back' to how it was. & I can't just understand how someone can just not feel it anymore when it was so good...but she's probably self-sabotaged all her relationships. Also (as stupid as this is) I think she "limited-profiled" me on facebook hahahaha |
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10.07.2009, 07:38 AM
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#87 |
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I know a few people who have basically dated online, barely even knowing each other in real life, having never spent time alone together but spending a couple of times amongst friends, and it's ridiculous, and now they're carrying on some kind of stupid long distance relationship from 4 hours away and they're both adult babies who are like 22-25 and don't have anything to show for their lives and it's just stupid and ... I'm going to stop now.
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10.07.2009, 07:41 AM
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#88 | |
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That's stupid, they seem afraid to live real life. |
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10.07.2009, 07:41 AM
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#89 | |
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I absolutely agree! I'm quite sure I wont find anyone that I would ever end up dating on one of these things. It's just a bit of fun at the moment. I've met a few people that I've spoken to online. One of whom I *dated*/fooled around with whatever. Actually, two ( I always forget the first one because he was a nightmare). I think that.. maybe a dating site is an alright way to kind of get an idea of a person, as much as you might get when you see them at a bar and talk for 5 minutes. If you want to get to know them any better, it takes time. As long as people are honest, learning about someone is no different online to irl ( I think ? ) You can make up shit about yourself or leave things out no matter how you communicate.
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10.07.2009, 07:42 AM
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#90 | |
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Sounds exactly like my last ex, who I described above. Heh. She cheated on me with a guy online who she admitted was "worse" than me because she said that I was too good to her and she couldn't return her love as much and it made her feel inferior. She was (and still is) crazy in love with me but she found some shitty temporary replacement that she admits to everyone isn't some amazing thing but she keeps leading this other guy on and he's making marriage plans after a few months of online dating bullshit, meanwhile she tells me she wants to marry me but she "can't" at this point in her life, and she moved away, temporarily, but still talks to me and is obviously still in love with me which makes things even more difficult, meanwhile saying she's going to "move on" so I give her plenty of space and then just as quickly she says "wait. no. I don't want to lose you." while still putting on this facade for this guy so he doesn't kill himself because he's a 25 year old virgin and basically this huge loser and just happens to be the only other guy in history to show her any attention so she thinks she has something special when she has only seem him maybe 6 times in her entire life and she's just basically living this stupid fucking facade and no one knows how she really is, except me, and I have to see all sides of it, and she even had sex with me about a million times while this guy thought they were dating, and she actually STILL insists (not just to me, again) they're not "together" in a boyfriend/girlfriend way but he's thought they were dating for like 4 months now and it's all just hilarious, and what do I really say to any of that stuff? And yeah Deaddisco, they are afraid to live real lives, my ex in particular is in debt BIG TIME and basically moved 1500 miles to get away from her mom, and sew all the time, and she can't find a job, and she's basically just so extremely immature and makes everything impossible for herself when I have been saving up for years for us to have a good future together. So ,she urged me to go see other people since she is "seeing other people" (but not in a romantic way) so I'm trying to move on, a bit, but I know we still love each other, and I know she's going to end up back here eventually, so it's kinda ridiculous, because even if she doesn't move back for a year, there's no way I'm NOT going to feel like I love her in a year from now -- we were together nearly 7 years! I've loved her for like ELEVEN YEARS! Though she says if we get back together again it'll be for good, which I like, but at the same time, it's all just sorta fucking ridiculous and the fact that she is leading this guy on and still doesn't have any concept of closure with me is kinda retarded. Oh well, she'll learn, I just hope she does soon, because I don't want to sabotage what could be a decent relationship with someone else either.
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10.07.2009, 07:43 AM
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#91 | |
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yeh, maybe stop asking her 'why'. If she's ended it she's done it for a reason. Begging for more answers than she can provide will only make you seem stalkerish, and certainly not get you any closer. Again, in my experience.
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10.07.2009, 07:48 AM
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#92 |
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Oh, when I say cheated, I mean to say that this dude kissed her while she was still dating me. Which may or may not be technically "cheating", but certainly it's something I wouldn't do. But yeah, she certainly didn't stop him from doing that. Though she said it made her feel sick. Though she didn't tell HIM that. And she has expressed to many people that she doesn't like for him to call her his "girlfriend". But, again, she won't tell HIM that. Basically, I think he's the type who will blow his fucking brains out, especially if he found out that we fucked about 10000 times after he considered her his girlfrined. But I'm nice enough and not vengeful, so I'm not going to tell him. So, either a) If they ever have a close relationship at all, it'll be built around lies and half-truths or b) She tells him the truth and he, in all honesty, will probably blow his brains out or kill her.. which I don't want to happen, but that's how creepy/obsessive this dude is. Either way, I win, but it's not like a victory I will celebrate or anything. It's all-around just shitty and immature and it makes me feel like shit. But oh well.
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10.07.2009, 07:49 AM
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#93 | |
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Yeah that's nuts man, I say forget her. She sounds manipulative as hell. Maybe not on purpose but like she gets backed into a corner to manipulate ya know? If my girl had been cheating on me I think it would have been easier in my mind to just sever the tie and connection we had. But she said there was noone else, I was the only guy she was fucking, she's not that kind of person, and I believe her. She had never lied to me before so I have no reason to not believe her. But hey man, yr new chick is hot. SO it seems to be working for ya! haha My thing is too fresh, I dont think Im 100% over her and have had a few options of smoking hot girls to hook up with but I just dont feel it. And now I fucking have mono...so Im just sitting around all day, way too far in my head haha... |
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10.07.2009, 08:00 AM
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#94 | |
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hopefully new girl will at least give you something else to think about for a while, because it cannot be healthy going over all this in your head as much as you do, let alone how little you must post of it.
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10.07.2009, 08:00 AM
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#95 |
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Well, I wouldn't call my new chick "my new chick" yet, haha. And even if she became my new chick for real, it'd be... sigh. I dunno. I will always have feelings for the old one, and yeah... I dunno. If you fuck someone for 7 years of your life, it's kinda hard to replace that!
Good luck with your situation. Nearly every girl I've ever dated has cheated on me. Kinda ridiculous, I dunno what to say. I've never cheated... in fact, I've only yelled at a girl once, ever. Nice guys finish last.
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10.07.2009, 08:02 AM
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#96 |
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"your new friend".
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10.07.2009, 08:03 AM
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#97 |
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& I could only imagine.
3 1/2 months felt like a long time to me. |
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10.07.2009, 08:11 AM
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#98 | |
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Not sure it's about replacing, more like chapters. It would break my heart to end my relationship. I haven't dated him forever, 3 years or so. It broke my heart the last 283487 times I broke up with someone. It isn't now as though I've never dated anyone else, it's just another person in my life. Maybe if it's that hard to move on, you'll be back together. But.. maybe if you never choose to move on, but she does.. where does that leave you. I think at some point you need to make that choice to turn a new page in your life for the better. (coming from having parents who were both divorced before they met each other, and are now divorced. My father has completely not moved on still, 7? years later. My mother definately has. Living in the past is pointless.
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10.07.2009, 08:13 AM
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#99 |
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The past was sexier, though.
I feel like every year of my life has made me nostalgic for the year before it. Anyway... back to your thread. 
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10.07.2009, 08:24 AM
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#100 | |
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Plus there's the way people generally communicate online about these things, which doesn't require much effort in terms of appearing like you are actually being receptive to minutiaes that might be of great importance to the guy/girl you are chatting to, so a whole chunk of what constitutes a conversation with a stranger in the flesh (albeit one you have some interest in getting to know better) is missing. I do believe that if it's just a sex thing it can totally work more often than a relationship hunt, though. By looks being important on my other post I didn't mean that one has to be necessarily good looking in a conventional way, that is something subjective to the physical requirements the person who's trying to get off with someone online demands, and those requirements vary from person to person. |
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