Akward experiences with the parents of significant others

viewtiful alan redux · 05.28.2010, 03:18 PM

I want some 'fuck my life', embarassing stories about your meetings or encounters with the parents of a boyfriend/girlfriend.

Mine: I went over to my girlfriend's house for dinner and to meet her parents, only to see her dad and discover he's a guy I had sold weed to several times... it was incredibly wierd because neither of us could say anything, but you could tell he was trying to find any reason he could think of to get me away from his daughter.. needless to say he eventually succeeded.

space · 05.28.2010, 03:27 PM

I'm sorry, but no...

I'm incredibly charming, and I never sell drugs to adults.

atsonicpark · 05.28.2010, 03:40 PM

Hm. One time, my ex had some kind of vaginal infection -- no, not an STD, I think it was just a yeast infection, and her mom said, "IT MUST BE BECAUSE ADAM HAS BEEN DOING THINGS WITH YOU DOWN THERE." and getting all nosey and personal even though she was 19 at the time. She seriously bothered my ex for like 2 hours trying to get her to tell her all this shit we had done, so my girlfriend finally said we had messed around cuz, duh, we're adults and shit... her mom, being a "Religious" woman, freaked the fuck out, got mad, and made sure my life was a living hell from then on out, and I'm pretty sure eventually pressured my ex to go in the direction she did (cheat on me and break up with me). But basically, I was never welcome over there after that. I wasn't welcome before then, really, either. Her mom and dad had all sorts of problems with me... my hair, the type of music I listened to, the fact that I don't wear jeans (I wear Dickies), that I was too short, that I wasn't religious enough, etc. Whereas my ex liked to hide behind this persona, and act like different people, towards different people, I have never changed who I am, or how I act, for anyone. Hence why I alienated them, apparently, even though I did tons of incredibly nice things, like waiting in line for a Wii for 17 hours for the family... watching their house for free for weeks at a time.. helping them paint, helping them move, all kinds of shit. I was still never respected.

terriblecanyons · 05.28.2010, 03:50 PM

Sonic Youth 37 · 05.28.2010, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by space

I'm sorry, but no...

I'm incredibly charming, and I never sell drugs to adults.

Well, so am I, but that hasn't helped the morning after "Who are you and how did you get in my house and where did you sleep?" looks/conversations.

ploesj · 05.28.2010, 04:59 PM

my ex's mother never liked me, she was this very realistic woman who had worked hard all her life and pressured her kids to go to university and to get successful.. and then this dreamy kid walked in, saying she'd like to make a living out of drawing pretty pictures. yeah.

Inhuman · 05.29.2010, 03:19 AM

Daaammmmnnn OP, that really licks, but was highly amusing to read.

Back in high school / first year of college I was with a girl and we had about a 10 minute interval where her mom hadn't got home from work, but we were back from school. One of the first times, we had a quickie and had to dispose the condom with no evidence. I ended up just flushing it down the toilet and waited to ensure the toilet didn't regurgitate it. It was fine, so I left and told my blonde we were successful. Her mom stepped in and noticed me and immediately questioned us if we fucked. We told her we were watching 'Friends' the whole time. She stepped into the washroom and then took my girlfriend aside and I heard some yelling from the other room, and I only imagined that the condom floated back up. I was right. It was embarrassing talking to her afterward, and even more embarrassing that her mom said to her 'wow, he must be big'.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ploesj

my ex's mother never liked me, she was this very realistic woman who had worked hard all her life and pressured her kids to go to university and to get successful.. and then this dreamy kid walked in, saying she'd like to make a living out of drawing pretty pictures. yeah.

Some people forget that hard work, good careers, etc... aren't the source of happiness, they just provide one with more money. My stepdad can be the same way to my brother since he's in uni taking a creative writing program

batreleaser · 05.29.2010, 09:37 AM

My old girlfriend's mom was a sociopath. They got in a fight about me and her fucking and to make my girlfriend angry her mom got shitfaced at a local bar and tried to fuck my dad. Like blatantly, as the story presents itself. My dad was still married to my mother at the time. She also just had those eyes, that dead glare that just creeps you out, impossible to stare the fucking woman in the eye.

My next girlfriend's mom was a sweetheart, but then caught us fucking and smoking weed in her bedroom. I wasn't allowed back.

Derek · 05.29.2010, 09:51 AM

My old girlfriend's mother was very nice to me until I asked my girlfriend not to hang out with someone she fucked from before which made me uncomfortable. Suddenly I was the nazi controlling boyfriend. Eh.

Her dad? He was always a prick.

ink. · 05.29.2010, 09:54 AM

I'm looking forward to my family ... being fucking insane as usual.

chicka · 05.29.2010, 10:15 AM

I had my MIL threaten to break my legs if I ever hurt her daughter again.
At the time due to MS she was confined to a wheelchair so as sad as that was it just kind of made the threat hollow and amusing to me.

space · 05.29.2010, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ink.

I'm looking forward to my family ... being fucking insane as usual.

do not underestimate my charmification!!

ink. · 05.30.2010, 06:03 AM

more likely that I'd over estimate my family.. hehe

amerikangod · 05.30.2010, 12:54 PM

When I was 21 I visited a chick for about two weeks. Her parents picked me up at the airport. It was very obvious that we were going to fuck. Her parents were the nicest people in the world and seemingly didn't mind. Apparently, the chick was very open with her mother. So after we did the deed, the mother pulled me aside the next day and basically winked at me and in so many words said "Way to nail the hell out of my daughter." It was awkward in that she was genuinely happy about the serious fuck I threw into her kid.

The second awkward moment happened towards the end of the trip. We were all in the car. Her father was driving. She mentioned that her bed had broken and it needed to be repaired (we had in fact broken it with rough sex.) And, without thinking, she also noted the need to go to the doctor for a yeast infection (also a result of rough sex.) Her father instantly made the connection. I saw him glance at me in the rear view mirror. He remained silent for about twenty minutes.

Dr. Eugene Felikson · 05.30.2010, 12:58 PM

Moms love me. Dads hate me.

It's been a consistent pattern throughout my life, mostly due to my obvious hatred for both sports, and cars.

chicka · 05.30.2010, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Eugene Felikson

Moms love me. Dads hate me.

It's been a consistent pattern throughout my life, mostly due to my obvious hatred for both sports, and cars.

the car and the sports got nothing to do with it. As a father of two girls myself there isn't a man out there worthy of my two girls plus as a man I also know what pigs men are. Mothers want to be grandmothers in the worst way and will settle for less in a man as long as he's not sterile...

Dr. Eugene Felikson · 05.30.2010, 01:13 PM

I'm very polite around parents, believe it or not. Almost too polite. But yeah, that could be it.

viewtiful alan redux · 05.30.2010, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by space

I'm sorry, but no...

I'm incredibly charming, and I never sell drugs to adults.

You do sell to small children though, don't you space?

space · 05.30.2010, 02:58 PM

at first, I read "You do sell small children", and was about to respond; then I re-read it, saw what you actually wrote, and changed my answer to "no".

SuchFriendsAreDangerous · 05.30.2010, 05:23 PM

when I was 17 me and a very long term girlfriend ended up fucking in her mom's car in the parking lot of a shopping center (I know, kids do the damnedest things).. it was getting to be a stereotype, foggy ass windows, bouncing car, my chick started getting excessively loud, we had only started making out but things get carried away when you're young, then out of no where a LOUD bang on the windows stopped us mid-fuck...

we thought it was like security or something. suddenly the door flings open, and its her momz....

we thought we were done for. the car smelled like fucking, the windows were completely fogged over, we were sweating like crazy, she had been straight yelling seconds before...

momz acted completely oblivious, didn't say a single word, started off with a bad joke, got in the car and we drove off. my chick didn't even get to pull her panties up under her skirt until the next stop, she was sitting back there comando with the love juices dripping on the seat.. lord have mercy I thought we were done for... since nothing happened we just finished the job at the next parking lot stop on the way home

05.28.2010, 03:18 PM	#1
viewtiful alan redux the destroyed room Join Date: May 2010 Posts: 563	I want some 'fuck my life', embarassing stories about your meetings or encounters with the parents of a boyfriend/girlfriend. Mine: I went over to my girlfriend's house for dinner and to meet her parents, only to see her dad and discover he's a guy I had sold weed to several times... it was incredibly wierd because neither of us could say anything, but you could tell he was trying to find any reason he could think of to get me away from his daughter.. needless to say he eventually succeeded.
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05.28.2010, 03:27 PM	#2
space expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2010 Posts: 1,553	I'm sorry, but no... I'm incredibly charming, and I never sell drugs to adults.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.28.2010, 03:40 PM	#3
atsonicpark invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 28,843	Hm. One time, my ex had some kind of vaginal infection -- no, not an STD, I think it was just a yeast infection, and her mom said, "IT MUST BE BECAUSE ADAM HAS BEEN DOING THINGS WITH YOU DOWN THERE." and getting all nosey and personal even though she was 19 at the time. She seriously bothered my ex for like 2 hours trying to get her to tell her all this shit we had done, so my girlfriend finally said we had messed around cuz, duh, we're adults and shit... her mom, being a "Religious" woman, freaked the fuck out, got mad, and made sure my life was a living hell from then on out, and I'm pretty sure eventually pressured my ex to go in the direction she did (cheat on me and break up with me). But basically, I was never welcome over there after that. I wasn't welcome before then, really, either. Her mom and dad had all sorts of problems with me... my hair, the type of music I listened to, the fact that I don't wear jeans (I wear Dickies), that I was too short, that I wasn't religious enough, etc. Whereas my ex liked to hide behind this persona, and act like different people, towards different people, I have never changed who I am, or how I act, for anyone. Hence why I alienated them, apparently, even though I did tons of incredibly nice things, like waiting in line for a Wii for 17 hours for the family... watching their house for free for weeks at a time.. helping them paint, helping them move, all kinds of shit. I was still never respected. __________________
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05.28.2010, 03:50 PM	#4
terriblecanyons invito al cielo Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: the land where large fuzzy dice still hang proudly like testicles from rear-view mirrors Posts: 5,949
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05.28.2010, 04:59 PM	#6
ploesj invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: antwerp. Posts: 2,901	my ex's mother never liked me, she was this very realistic woman who had worked hard all her life and pressured her kids to go to university and to get successful.. and then this dreamy kid walked in, saying she'd like to make a living out of drawing pretty pictures. yeah. __________________ blog flickr
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05.29.2010, 09:37 AM	#8
batreleaser invito al cielo Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: New York, NY Posts: 5,155	My old girlfriend's mom was a sociopath. They got in a fight about me and her fucking and to make my girlfriend angry her mom got shitfaced at a local bar and tried to fuck my dad. Like blatantly, as the story presents itself. My dad was still married to my mother at the time. She also just had those eyes, that dead glare that just creeps you out, impossible to stare the fucking woman in the eye. My next girlfriend's mom was a sweetheart, but then caught us fucking and smoking weed in her bedroom. I wasn't allowed back. __________________ listen to pink reason
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05.29.2010, 09:51 AM	#9
Derek invito al cielo Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 8,095	My old girlfriend's mother was very nice to me until I asked my girlfriend not to hang out with someone she fucked from before which made me uncomfortable. Suddenly I was the nazi controlling boyfriend. Eh. Her dad? He was always a prick.
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05.29.2010, 09:54 AM	#10
ink. the end of the ugly Join Date: Apr 2010 Posts: 862	I'm looking forward to my family ... being fucking insane as usual.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.29.2010, 10:15 AM	#11
chicka expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: wormtown MA Posts: 1,549	I had my MIL threaten to break my legs if I ever hurt her daughter again. At the time due to MS she was confined to a wheelchair so as sad as that was it just kind of made the threat hollow and amusing to me. __________________ some men just want to watch the world burn
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05.30.2010, 06:03 AM	#13
ink. the end of the ugly Join Date: Apr 2010 Posts: 862	more likely that I'd over estimate my family.. hehe
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05.30.2010, 12:54 PM	#14
amerikangod invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,761	When I was 21 I visited a chick for about two weeks. Her parents picked me up at the airport. It was very obvious that we were going to fuck. Her parents were the nicest people in the world and seemingly didn't mind. Apparently, the chick was very open with her mother. So after we did the deed, the mother pulled me aside the next day and basically winked at me and in so many words said "Way to nail the hell out of my daughter." It was awkward in that she was genuinely happy about the serious fuck I threw into her kid. The second awkward moment happened towards the end of the trip. We were all in the car. Her father was driving. She mentioned that her bed had broken and it needed to be repaired (we had in fact broken it with rough sex.) And, without thinking, she also noted the need to go to the doctor for a yeast infection (also a result of rough sex.) Her father instantly made the connection. I saw him glance at me in the rear view mirror. He remained silent for about twenty minutes. __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.30.2010, 12:58 PM	#15
Dr. Eugene Felikson invito al cielo Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 7,570	Moms love me. Dads hate me. It's been a consistent pattern throughout my life, mostly due to my obvious hatred for both sports, and cars.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

05.30.2010, 01:13 PM	#17
Dr. Eugene Felikson invito al cielo Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 7,570	I'm very polite around parents, believe it or not. Almost too polite. But yeah, that could be it.
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05.30.2010, 02:58 PM	#19
space expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Apr 2010 Posts: 1,553	at first, I read "You do sell small children", and was about to respond; then I re-read it, saw what you actually wrote, and changed my answer to "no".
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05.30.2010, 05:23 PM	#20
SuchFriendsAreDangerous invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: fucking Los Angeles Posts: 14,801	when I was 17 me and a very long term girlfriend ended up fucking in her mom's car in the parking lot of a shopping center (I know, kids do the damnedest things).. it was getting to be a stereotype, foggy ass windows, bouncing car, my chick started getting excessively loud, we had only started making out but things get carried away when you're young, then out of no where a LOUD bang on the windows stopped us mid-fuck... we thought it was like security or something. suddenly the door flings open, and its her momz.... we thought we were done for. the car smelled like fucking, the windows were completely fogged over, we were sweating like crazy, she had been straight yelling seconds before... momz acted completely oblivious, didn't say a single word, started off with a bad joke, got in the car and we drove off. my chick didn't even get to pull her panties up under her skirt until the next stop, she was sitting back there comando with the love juices dripping on the seat.. lord have mercy I thought we were done for... since nothing happened we just finished the job at the next parking lot stop on the way home __________________ Today Rap music is the Lakers
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