[Pookie]

Originally Posted by sonicl

Dear Pookie,

Are you looking for a fight?

All the best,
Chris Youbank

You big girl's blouse.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by king_buzzo

Pookie, what shall i do?
read
play games
post here
play guitar
watch tv
do nothing

Definitely do nothing.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by sarramkrop

Dear Pookie,

Should Anne Robinson face public execution via phone votes X Factor style?

Fanny Le Buff

Welwyn Garden City

Better still, a variation on The Golden Shot.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by jon boy

dear pookie,

why?

stewart, drigg.

Because what's the alternative?

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by Everyneurotic

dear spookie:

a hip-hopera about liberace, wack or bomb?

50 cent.

Mos definitely def.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by Everyneurotic

dear spookie,

i'm hungry, is there a meal you can have that can suck your testicles back into your body?

dominick aguirre
east l.a.

Knuckle sandwich?

[sonicl]

Dear Pookie,

Originally Posted by Pookie

As my grandmother used to say:

Set makes you wet
Clear's for queers

Did you grandmother really used to say this? Why?

Yours
Prince Harry of Windsor

[jon boy]

dear pookie,

i was thinking of getting a mail order bride. russian or thai?

lester cribbins, setaon carew.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by tommy smith

dear spookie,

i have...found the...denial of a...long...full length...prod...by...the...ironic moustaches...would be the key...to...a paid occupation...and would enable me to humilate...that...alarming...dog...and...guess...t he...motivation for the job, should i 'go for it' as ignorant people say or should i...spin?

kindly and sincere to you,

tommy smith
miami, florida.

Your question was long and wordy, so I removed some words, to get to the crux. And the answer is a categorical, Go for it!

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by sonicl

Dear Pookie,


Did you grandmother really used to say this? Why?

Yours
Prince Harry of Windsor

Are you questioning my old grandmother's wisdom?

[sonicl]

Originally Posted by Pookie

Are you questioning my old grandmother's wisdom?

Why shouldn't I? You should hear some of the things people say about my gran.

All the best,
Hazza.

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by jon boy

dear pookie,

i was thinking of getting a mail order bride. russian or thai?

lester cribbins, setaon carew.

As my old grandmother used to say, "Don't go russian to thai the knot". Oh, how we would laugh.

[floatingslowly]

Dear Pookie,

What's the best way to prevent spoilage when preserving a brain in a jar?

My collection of brutal dictators is starting to smell a little gamey (despite the deep freeze).

Taxidermically Puzzled,

The Shaw of Antarctica

[Everyneurotic]

dear spookie:

i have been contemplating this for the past couple of days; since keith said he snorted his dad, i have been wanting to do the same. should i go for it as fast as i can?

yours sincerely

johnny depp

[Everyneurotic]

dear spookie:

if it itches, is it a message from jesus telling me to slaughter all the neighborhood cats?

dean ferguson

[RdTv]

dear pookie,

when washing off blood from your car, whats better a pressure washer or a ordinary mit?

sincerely,
Lord Alibaski

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by Kegmama

Dear Pookie,

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

Sincerely,
Sophie Fowler Gallaudet

Talking of cursing mutes:

A deaf mute walks into a pharmacy to buy condoms, but has difficulty communicating with the pharmacist, and can't see the condoms on the shelf.

Frustrated, he finally unzips his trousers, places his dick on the counter, and puts down a five pound note next to it.
The pharmacist unzips his trousers, does the same as the deaf-mute, and then picks up both notes and stuffs them in his pocket.
Exasperated, the deaf mute begins to curse the pharmacist wildly in sign language. "Look," the pharmacist says, "if you can't afford to lose, you shouldn't bet."

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by jonny depp

dear spookie:

i have been contemplating this for the past couple of days; since keith said he snorted his dad, i have been wanting to do the same. should i go for it as fast as i can?

yours sincerely

johnny depp

No! Snort your own dad's ashes.

[king_buzzo]

Dear Pookie

Seeing as it is easter and my grandparents haven't seen me in a while, do you think they'll send me some money???

[Pookie]

Originally Posted by Everyneurotic

dear spookie:

if it itches, is it a message from jesus telling me to slaughter all the neighborhood cats?

dean ferguson

Are we talking jock itch here? If so, it's Jesus telling you to take a bath. Slaughtering all the neighbourhood cats will only exacerbate the problem.