Everything's bottoms... - Page 3

Danny Himself · 08.31.2006, 05:49 PM

Massachusetts.

porkmarras · 08.31.2006, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hip Priest

My Ass

Stephen is seated at a large desk in American military
uniform, smoking a huge cigar: a Stars and Stripes
flag hangs behind him.

Stephen: Jacobson! Get your ass in here right now!

Hugh enters, also in uniform, carrying a holdall.

Hugh: Sir!

Stephen: Jacobson, what the hell am I going to do with
your ass?

Hugh: My ass, sir?

Stephen: Can you think of one goddamn reason why I
shouldn't kick your ass all the way back to New
Mexico?

Hugh: Well, sir if this concerns ...

Stephen: You know what the hell it concerns, Jacobson.
It concerns your ass! What does it concern?

Hugh: My ass, sir.

Stephen: Do you recall what it was I said to you the
last time you were in here?

Hugh: Well sir. You told me to move my ass, and haul my
ass, and not to sit on my ass, because if I did, you
would personally rearrange my ass.

Stephen: Uh uh. Wrong, Mr Jacobson. I was not going to
rearrange your ass - I was going to boil your ass
in a bag, and have your ass for breakfast.

Hugh: That's it, sir. Have my ass for breakfast.

Stephen: Read that sign, Jacobson.

Hugh looks at a sign on Stephen's desk.

Hugh: "The buck stops at my ass."

Stephen: See, that's why I have this star Jacobson. Because
my ass is on the line.

Hugh: The bottom line ... ?

Stephen: The bottom line.

Hugh: I understand.

Stephen: Well, I am glad you got your ass straight on that
one. Now Jacobson, I've got myself a problem.

Hugh: A problem, sir?

Stephen: Yup. Seems that some goddamn college boy on
the fifth floor wants a piece of my ass ...

Hugh: Your ass, sir?

Stephen: You bet your ass, my ass. If I could just get
my hands on this guy's ass, his ass is history.

Hugh: Whose ass would that be sir?

Stephen: The guy who's got his ass in my face, Jacobson.

Hugh: Sir?

Stephen: Yes, Jacobson?

Hugh: How does my ass fit into all of this?

Stephen: It's very simple, Jacobson. You are aware that
your ass is mine?

Hugh: It is sir?

Stephen: Oh yes, your ass is mine, mister. The day you
joined the army, you signed your ass over to me.

Hugh: I get it, sir.

Stephen: Oh you do, do you?

Hugh: This guy wants a piece of your ass, so you're
thinking that, being as my ass is yours, maybe you
could give him a piece of my ass as a way of saving
your ass.

Stephen: Shut your ass, Jacobson. Nobody likes a smart
Alec. Now boy ...

Hugh: Sir?

Stephen: Got your ass with you?

Hugh: Yes sir.

Hugh plops the bag on the desk. Stephen looks into the bag.

Hugh: With respect, sir, don't jerk my ass around.

Stephen: Mm. Nice piece of ass.

Pay your reputation dues assholes!

!@#$%! · 08.31.2006, 06:03 PM

oh wow. youtube!

part 1:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DnAxYWNI9E

part 2:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Te1O6b0iNHc

Cantankerous · 08.31.2006, 06:04 PM

bitchin' ass.

Pookie · 08.31.2006, 06:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

i think basil fawlty pointed that out best

(see "waldorf salad" episode)

Rep to you for getting the reference.

!@#$%! · 08.31.2006, 06:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pookie

Rep to you for getting the reference.

basil's answer to hamilton is one of the most fucking hilarious lines ever. unfuckingforgettable.

--
ps those clips i posted are not complete, by the way. apparently the part of basil hitting his car with a tree is not there. and then you don't understand why chef is gone.

--

"bustis?"

Hip Priest · 09.01.2006, 04:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

...ps those clips i posted are not complete, by the way. apparently the part of basil hitting his car with a tree is not there. and then you don't understand why chef is gone...

The car-hitting scene is in the 'Gourmet Evening' episode.

Pookie · 09.01.2006, 04:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hip Priest

The car-hitting scene is in the 'Gourmet Evening' episode.

I clearly remember the car hitting scene from when the show was first aired. It's a bit over-exposed now, but it was the funniest thing at the time.

Hip Priest · 09.01.2006, 04:34 AM

The Major is my favourite thing about Fawlty Towers. Ballard Berkeley is so good at that role, and my favourite is probably his rat-hunting scene.

youthoftomorrow · 09.01.2006, 05:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pookie

Good ass

i don't believe that i have ever heard (much less used) that phrase.

jon boy · 09.01.2006, 05:31 AM

kick ass. suck ass.

i noticed in america how everything was abreviated.

Pookie · 09.01.2006, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by youthoftomorrow

i don't believe that i have ever heard (much less used) that phrase.

All of the words & expressions in my first post were taken from posts by Americans on this board. Can't remember who said that & where.

porkmarras · 09.01.2006, 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jon boy

kick ass. suck ass.

i noticed in america how everything was abreviated.

Abbreviations = packaged peeled oranges that at one point you would spot in Sansburys.In other words........laziness personified.

matt g · 09.01.2006, 08:44 AM

dumb ass
grab ass
gettin' some ass
assfixiashun

most used by me-
ass head

HaydenAsche · 09.01.2006, 10:59 AM

I'm a top, thank you.

Ripchord · 09.01.2006, 11:04 AM

Loose Lips Sink Ships, ass.
Wait, no.

Pookie · 08.09.2007, 10:54 AM

Also, Americans say "holidays" instead of "holiday", and "could care less" when it should be "couldn't care less".

davenotdead · 08.09.2007, 11:27 AM

pookie, i think the holidays thing has to do with the winter holiday containing Christmas, kwanzaa, hannakuh, new years, new years eve, etc....and instead of 'holiday' , we usually say vacation...

Pookie · 08.09.2007, 11:42 AM

That's what I like. A logical answer!

08.31.2006, 05:49 PM	#41
Danny Himself invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 9,623	Massachusetts.
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08.31.2006, 06:03 PM	#43
!@#$%! invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: mars attacks Posts: 42,457	oh wow. youtube! part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DnAxYWNI9E part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Te1O6b0iNHc
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08.31.2006, 06:04 PM	#44
Cantankerous invito al cielo Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: A RETIREMENT HOME Posts: 18,499	bitchin' ass. __________________ RETIRED
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09.01.2006, 04:34 AM	#49
Hip Priest invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Birkenhead Posts: 9,397	The Major is my favourite thing about Fawlty Towers. Ballard Berkeley is so good at that role, and my favourite is probably his rat-hunting scene. __________________ Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good. http://www.flickr.com/photos/outsidethecamp/
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09.01.2006, 05:31 AM	#51
jon boy invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: psycho battery Posts: 12,161	kick ass. suck ass. i noticed in america how everything was abreviated. __________________ Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing \|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration V _ \ / _ PING <-------- moments later / \ http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhxq...isruo1_500.gif
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09.01.2006, 08:44 AM	#54
matt g bad moon rising Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: cimmaron hills Posts: 171	dumb ass grab ass gettin' some ass assfixiashun most used by me- ass head
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09.01.2006, 10:59 AM	#55
HaydenAsche invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 10,755	I'm a top, thank you. __________________ rip
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

09.01.2006, 11:04 AM	#56
Ripchord the destroyed room Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Amherst, MA Posts: 549	Loose Lips Sink Ships, ass. Wait, no. __________________
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08.09.2007, 10:54 AM	#57
Pookie invito al cielo Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 9,877	Also, Americans say "holidays" instead of "holiday", and "could care less" when it should be "*couldn't* care less".
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08.09.2007, 11:27 AM	#58
davenotdead invito al cielo Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 7,784	pookie, i think the holidays thing has to do with the winter holiday containing Christmas, kwanzaa, hannakuh, new years, new years eve, etc....and instead of 'holiday' , we usually say vacation... __________________
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08.09.2007, 11:42 AM	#59
Pookie invito al cielo Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 9,877	That's what I like. A logical answer!
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|