[Pookie]

Originally Posted by Graham Nascent

Dear Pookie,

I'm afraid of the sun! Why is it such a cunt? Tell it to fuck off. The fucking bastard.

Graham Nascent.

Funny, it says the same about you.

Originally Posted by Barborous Zappa

Dear Pookie,
I have a small willy and the doctor told me that it wont grow any bigger either.I'm 45 years old and have been waiting for some miracles to happen for years to no avail.The choice of remedies is varied but they don't seem to work for me so i'm contemplating the idea of having plastic surgery to have it replaced.Any good words for me?

Yours

Barbarous Zappa

Bora Bora

I like 'adoxography' and 'lalochezia'.

Originally Posted by ferdinand "barney" chernovetzky

dear pookie,

i'm an existentialist and i have read the works of the greats and the more obscure thinkers, yet i'm still feeling a little empty on the subject; i've had many a sleepless night trying to figure it out but i just can't stop thinking about it.

so, i ask you, twizzlers or red vines?

ferdinand "barney" chernovetzky.

st. petersburg, russia.

WOODY ALLEN: That's quite a lovely Jackson Pollock, isn't it?
GIRL IN MUSEUM: Yes it is.

WOODY ALLEN: What does it say to you?

GIRL IN MUSEUM: It restates the negativeness of the universe, the hideous lonely emptiness of existence, nothingness, the predicament of man forced to live in a barren, godless eternity, like a tiny flame flickering in an immense void, with nothing but waste, horror, and degradation, forming a useless bleak straightjacket in a black absurd cosmos.

WOODY ALLEN: What are you doing Saturday night?

GIRL IN MUSEUM: Committing suicide.

WOODY ALLEN: What about Friday night?

Originally Posted by GEOFF RINGWORM

dear pookie,

i seem to have lodged a bottle up my rectum and cant get it out. its been about an hour and no matter how much lube i use there is just no freeing it. what should i do?

geoff ringworm, crawley.

Buy another bottle.