Re: borderline
It was mutual. She warned me about the i love you, i hate you, don't ever leave me pattern. She once felt hate for me because I didn't understand her belief in communism. I thought it was just a normal conversation. I had a borderline diagnosis once (inaccurate) and I sort of did that before. Not hate, but phases of obsessive love, no love, break up/get back together over and over, then never able to move on. So I wasn't entirely scared. Sounds like I should have been though.
Re: bipolar
I can't hold a job. Between migraines, anxiety and bipolar I never make it past a couple months. I enjoy making music and art but I have no idea how to make a living off of it. Every aptitude test I've ever taken told me to be a visual artist. I only make visual art for my music though. I have had very unpleasant experiences traveling out of town to play shows but some day I will force myself to tour. (have no idea how to organize one either.)
Finding the right meds is key. Trouble is it takes years to figure out.
Anti depressant: paxil
Mood stabilizers: lamictal, depakote, seroquel
Anti psychotic: risperdal
Migraines: maxalt, cannabis, naproxen
Also -
Hormones: spironolactone, nadolol, finasteride
And more!
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