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Originally Posted by porkmarras
'Cheer up,it may never happen' is the most irritating phrase because i have been told that a few times when i was reading a book in a pub while having a pint.It is also normally a sign for people who are obviously sad themselves but want to put on a brave face and think that the whole world is synchronized with what they have in their heads.'No mate,i'm happy and relaxed and reading this rather nice book.It is you,twat,who should be doing the cheering up and not me'.
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Those people need to die. I hope everyone who's ever sat in a pub on their own reading has felt this pain. I used to do it a lot, and it annoyed the fuck out of me. The problem is that these people are generally trying to be friendly... but are clearly too inept to ask something more leading, like, "Whatcha reading there skip?". That's nice. That's a good conversation opener. "Cheer up, it might never happen" "Ironically, I would cheer up if 'it' did happen. 'It' being your immediate bloody and painful death, cunt". Of course what I actually say is, "I look that bad do I? I must not be drinking enough", take a long draw on my drink and look at the door asif I'm waiting for someone.
You non-English have no idea of the pain we go through because we're such pathologically socially inept people.