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!@#$%! · 08.17.2007, 11:13 PM

dammit man, you are wise beyond your years. yes, the "you can't make me" is my style, i have a short temper, i am quite the brute, impulsive, and i often choose the low road instead of the high one, and i have a flair for the dramatic (as you probably have observed already). i am able to have cool & collected dialogues usually only after having vented my rage, and i've done all sorts of shit to piss of people in authority over the years. i even got a teacher fired because he was a fucking incompetent and abusive asshole. yep, that's me.

anyway, you sound a lot more calm than i am (oh a lot calmer), but whatever your style or your methods, whether you use guerrilla tactics or an all-out war or cool & collected diplomacy, it's time to shift the power balance in your life. you need to grab a little bit more independence-- not by sneaking around but by saying "this is mine". in the past few months i recall your botched attendance to the xiu xiu concert, first with the funds and then with the day of the week, and some other things perhaps, and now this.

the problem is that nobody is going to give you power, or rights, or whatever you want to call them. you have to grab them. wrestle them for yourself. it's part of growing up. sure some people do it in typical teenage shit style, others like you may choose a more sophisticated road. but the fact remains that you need to figure out the way to end being treated like a little child because, well, you aren't one. what you posted above is proof of it.

maybe you need to recruit the help of the old man. maybe you will have to argue around in circles, maybe you'll have to come up with a fait accompli. but you are not at an age when being ordered around by your mother like a little child is beneficial to you. sure, that's what she's done all her life, maybe she refuses to let go of your childhood, but this is your life so it's your job to draw out your territory.

and on the subject of the fait accompli technique, well, it's a way to start chipping away at rules that no longer apply. when i was i think 15 i started going to parties & drinking (sorry, different country, different culture, it was ok there), and i usually had a time when i had to be back. so i would arrive maybe an hour later. i'd get shit, i'd say "oh we couldnt find a cab", and blah blah blah, but for the next time i got the curfew extended maybe a little-- they got used to it. eventually they stopped fretting, i would come home the next day if there was something interesting going on, whatever. but anyway-- when my brother went through the same phase he had an easy ride because i had already razed the enemy fortifications for him. lucky bastard. i did all the work. but if you have nobody covering the ground for you it's up to you to carve up your space.

so-- some times you have to push the rules a little just to make more room to breath.

anyway, best wishes with whatever you do.

08.17.2007, 11:13 PM	#28
!@#$%! invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: mars attacks Posts: 42,468	dammit man, you are wise beyond your years. yes, the "you can't make me" is my style, i have a short temper, i am quite the brute, impulsive, and i often choose the low road instead of the high one, and i have a flair for the dramatic (as you probably have observed already). i am able to have cool & collected dialogues usually only after having vented my rage, and i've done all sorts of shit to piss of people in authority over the years. i even got a teacher fired because he was a fucking incompetent and abusive asshole. yep, that's me. anyway, you sound a lot more calm than i am (oh a lot calmer), but whatever your style or your methods, whether you use guerrilla tactics or an all-out war or cool & collected diplomacy, it's time to shift the power balance in your life. you need to grab a little bit more independence-- not by sneaking around but by saying "this is mine". in the past few months i recall your botched attendance to the xiu xiu concert, first with the funds and then with the day of the week, and some other things perhaps, and now this. the problem is that nobody is going to give you power, or rights, or whatever you want to call them. you have to grab them. wrestle them for yourself. it's part of growing up. sure some people do it in typical teenage shit style, others like you may choose a more sophisticated road. but the fact remains that you need to figure out the way to end being treated like a little child because, well, you aren't one. what you posted above is proof of it. maybe you need to recruit the help of the old man. maybe you will have to argue around in circles, maybe you'll have to come up with a fait accompli. but you are not at an age when being ordered around by your mother like a little child is beneficial to you. sure, that's what she's done all her life, maybe she refuses to let go of your childhood, but this is your life so it's your job to draw out your territory. and on the subject of the fait accompli technique, well, it's a way to start chipping away at rules that no longer apply. when i was i think 15 i started going to parties & drinking (sorry, different country, different culture, it was ok there), and i usually had a time when i had to be back. so i would arrive maybe an hour later. i'd get shit, i'd say "oh we couldnt find a cab", and blah blah blah, but for the next time i got the curfew extended maybe a little-- they got used to it. eventually they stopped fretting, i would come home the next day if there was something interesting going on, whatever. but anyway-- when my brother went through the same phase he had an easy ride because i had already razed the enemy fortifications for him. lucky bastard. i did all the work. but if you have nobody covering the ground for you it's up to you to carve up your space. so-- some times you have to push the rules a little just to make more room to breath. anyway, best wishes with whatever you do.
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