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Originally Posted by Murmer99
i dont have a specific number.. but im definitely not happy.. or angry, or sad for that matter. i just dont really care for much anymore. i havent picked up my guitar in a while and have no desire to write songs. music doesnt make me happy, and it used to be the only thing that did. i cant really tell the difference between every day i live, my life is very boring. basically, the only thing i can do now is sit around all day... nothing else besides music has really done anything to make me happy. i used to find little things that would entertain me like movies or albums, playing with my dog, etc.. but i dont know... it doesnt make me happy. and i have been out lots of times, i cannot socialize, period. i have a dull personality and cant ever say anything. im really shy and quiet. so uh yeah... thats all
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If it affects you that you perceive yourself as dull or quite, the belief that you are reinforces the fact that it is. Thoughts and perception of reality govern the entire way that your life treats ya. To quote the Dhammapada:
"All that we are arises from our thoughts". Either becoming comfortable with being shy or working on dismissing the thought that you are shy can make a huge difference. I hope you find something that motivates you to be happier.
I too am quiet, and wasn't happy for quite a while, but it's been getting better. Negative occurrences doesn't have much impact on me, I feel like I've gone through the worst already. Lately do a lot of philosophical and spiritual reading, and every few weekends experimenting with psychoactives to gain new perspectives. Trying to break routines more... all week coding + carpal tunnel syndrome and being inside from a work-from-home job can get pretty repetitive.