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Originally Posted by space
my personal favorite is "you are the antichrist". I've had my fair share of that one too; the best time being by a (literally) retarded person.
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That would have made my life.
One of the most memorable failed insults directed at me occurred in my sophomore year of high school, in a math class. We were learning shit about geometry. The teacher had a rectangle drawn on the board, and in the interest of making it more 'fun,' he decided to transform it into a portrait. He picked a kid in one of the front seats, and drew an extremely crude representation of his face within the rectangle. The kid's last name was King, so he also drew a crown on his head and wrote 'KING' underneath it. There were a few soft chuckles in the classroom. Mostly emanating out of assholes.
At this point the dude that sat in front of me, whom I'd never spoken to before, turns around with the smuggest look I've ever seen. It was so genuinely smug that it was priceless.
Him: You see that?
Me: Huh? What?
Him: That, on the board.
Me: ... uh.
Him: That's you.
Me: ...
Him: You're the king. The king of
shit.
Me: LOLWUT (or whatever the 1997 equivalent was.)