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Old 07.17.2012, 01:18 PM   #16011
Dr. Eugene Felikson
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Saw it in 3D last night (you know how I do), and as a pretty big Spider-Man fan, I've gotta admit I was disappointed throughout the film's entirity.

Let me just start out by claiming that it was ABSOLUTE GENIUS to cast Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy. She couldn't have possibly looked the part more, and I applaud the big wig who made the decision to land her in role. She's stunning on screen, and nailed just about every line with astonishing talent.

Sadly, that was just about the only casting decision that actually worked for me. Essential players like Peter Parker, Uncle Ben, and Aunt May were entirely mis-cast, imho, and left the film feeling much flatter than it should have. Side characters - like Dennis Leary as Capt. George Stacy, and whoever it was who played Dr. Connors were nice decisions, but both were far too underused. Same goes for Flash Thompson.

In speaking of flat - is this the best 3D experience they could work out for a FUCKING SPIDER-MAN MOVIE!?!?! The franchise pretty much loans itself to the gimmick, yet for the first time in a long while, I felt myself thinking "Damn, I should've just seen this in 2D."

The writing also stunk. While it was nice to see Spidey finally have his web shooters again, it would've been even keener if there was some actual character development ANYWHERE throughout the film.

Given how recently the Raimi films were released, and the general popularity of the Spider-Man character, including the vigilante's origin again wasn't only unnecessary, but forced as well. The filmmakers must've been aware of this as they specifically tried to avoid retreading essential scenes in Spidey's origin like Ben Parker's "With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility" line, the wrestling match, etc.

Here's an idea - DON'T INCLUDE THE ORIGIN AT ALL! Remember films like Batman Forever or even the dreadful Batman & Robin?! Completely different cast, but they didn't bother retelling Batman's origin over, and over again - BECAUSE PEOPLE ALREADY KNOW WHO THE FUCK BATMAN IS, and if you're buying a ticket to see The Amazing Spider-Man, guess what, YOU ALREADY KNOW WHO THE FUCK SPIDER-MAN IS. There's no need to re-establish that! Not even for kids!

Also who the fuck is this clown pretending to be Peter Parker? Worst part of the movie, in my eyes. Peter Parker isn't some Twilight-looking skateboard punk with a big brain and a heart of gold. He's a nerdy dweeb who couldn't gain respect amongst the majority of his peers, even if he tried. That's what makes Spider-Man work! The dichotomy between Peter Parker and his alter-ego! I'm sorry, but this time around, I'm just not buying it. Also, could he put his damn cell phone away!?! Jesus!

Don't get me wrong, the film did have a fair share of entertaining and/or neat moments, but I found my attention drifting over to the "exit" signs in the corners of the cinema more than once. And that should never happen when you pay like $13 to go see a flick. Especially not one as high-profile as this.
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