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Old 02.04.2013, 06:59 PM   #34908
dead_battery
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INTRO: This was the original story that was written in the Twilight Saga! This is all the deleted scenes that will now be in the 5th Movie! "A SHOT AT LOVE WITH TILA TEQUILA AND THE TWILIGHT CAST"

The night was once again dark and gloomy. It was so quiet and all you could hear was the rustle of the tree leaves as I sat at the top of the highest tree in the forest. This has been my hiding place the entire time all of this Chaos has been happening between Edward, Bella, & Jacob...etc. I sit atop of my tree as a dark Ninja in the night, watching over my children as they confuse themselves in childish chaos & confusing love triangles. I sit quietly atop of my Ninja Hiding spot watching them daily, jumping from tree to tree, Roof to roof, without any of them ever seeing me. I am the pure heart and soul that is the key to it all. I am the key that is missing from what they all have been trying to find & figure out in their confused, torn, and tormented worlds.......but alas.....it was not my time yet to show myself.

I have been carefully been following them and keeping my eyes on all of them for months now.....flying quickly past them with my other Ninja's in the night. We cascade carefully around the city, lurking every corner, every wall, watching, through every window. The Ninjas of the night has the most power combined between the warewolves and the Vampires. How silly of them not realizing that there is a much bigger, darker, more powerful force amongst them.......... The Ninjas. I of course, am the leader of my pack. My sensei sent me down here to watch over all of the forces fighting amongst each other, destroying themselves. I do as my Sensei tells me to do, as long as it takes, I wait silently in the dark with patience. My role is to finally show myself and my the rest of my Ninjas of the Night once things become too chaotic.....and now, after months of watching these kids, now is the time for me to come in and save them from destroying themselves. Things are about to get crazy.......

CUT TO SCENE: Bella is losing her mind, lost, confused, heartbroken, she has lost her way. She wants to just follow her heart, but she does not realize that her heart is not able to be heard truly with so much commotion surrounding her. Jacob is trying to help her, but he doesn't realize that he is just making this situation worse. Jacob loves her but really he just wants what he can't have. Bella at this point is a challenge. Jacob has fallen in love with his own infatuation to win over Bella because she is now a Challenge, since she confused & still in love with Edward......and of course, Edward, being who he is.....this is also too much for him to handle. The intense love for Bella, and Bella's undying love for him, Jacob there to cock block everything, wolves and vampires fighting....this is all too much.
As all this is happening at the same time, I felt like now is my time to show myself. In the midst of all the chaos, I fly down from my secret tree and float so quietly above them all, that they cannot see me at this point. Finally once the Wolves were about to attack the other vampires I suddenly crash down into the middle of it all!!!! Everyone was in shock for a second and stood still, surrounding me, as I am right smack dab in the middle of this brawl!
Still with my Ninja face cover on & with my Katana Sword, they all stop and get ready to fight me next.

"WHO ARE YOU????"

They all scream at me, ready to jump on me, without realizing that my Ninja powers will destroy them all! As all the Vampires & Wolves start to run towards me I spin with my Katana sword in circles as fast as a tornado and causes all the hair & wind to blow them back away from me. They all fall down.

"STOP WHERE YOU ARE!" I command! Then I rip off my mask and show my face! At first, silence!

Then they all gasp, "OOHHHH MYYY GOD! OHHH MY GOD! OMGGG DO YOU GUYS KNOW WHO THAT IS??? OMG! NO WAY! IT CAN'T BE??? IS IT?? COULD IT BE?? WOW THAT'S FUCKING TILA TEQUILA MAN! HOLY SHIT!"

Once they all realize it's me, Tila Tequila, the Legendary Ninja of the Night, they all start to chase me and scream

"OMG TILA I LOVE YOU SOOOOO MUCH! PLEASE PICK ME! NO! DONT PICK HIM! PICK MEE TILA I LOVE YOU MORE DAMMIT!" OHHH DONT LISTEN TO EDWARD OR BELLA FUCK THEM BOTH, I LOVE YOU TILA PICK MEEEE JACOB!"

So just like I said, I knew it would get chaotic once I get there.....so as they are all chasing me, I fly up from tree to tree and roof to roof while they all chase me around. Bella is riding on Jacob once he transforms into a Wolf so they can follow me. Edward also has tree climbing powers so he is right behind me on my tail. I can't take this anymore! This is not how this is supposed to be! I am supposed to be here to help them, but now they have totally lost control and have all fall madly in love with me. I needed to find STRENGTH in myself to stop running and FIX this problem, or else my Sensei will be VERY UPSET WITH ME!
So I finally stop hopping around from tree to tree & roof to roof. I finall jump down to the floor in the middle of the grass field.

"STOP!!!!!!" EVERYONE STOP RIGHT THERE!"

I screamed out as I held my sword to them. They all stop....all with their eyes deeply fixated on me. Here comes the hard part. I am going to have to tell them all the truth of what is going on and what they must do. This will be painful and heartbreaking, but that is my job. It is to make them stronger and realize who they really are and what their purpose in life really is. They are all so lost and confused. I is my duty to come save them. So Edward, Jacob, and Bella all line up in front of me, with their lost puppy dog eyes. It was as though they couldn't breathe. They were all holding their breath. I could hear all of their hearts pounding as all their attention was on me.

"Ok everyone! I know you all have had a rough time here for the past few months. I have come down to save you from your troubles. I am the truth. I was sent here to tell you all what your purpose in life is, but unfortunately, only one of you will be able to leave this place and escape with me into a world of Paradise and everlasting love!"

"Edward, Please come forward" as I hold out my hand and he desperately grabs it, hoping that I will be the one he picks.

"My Darling Edward, I know u think you are immensely in love with me, but I'm gonna have to break this to you honey. You are very sexy, deep, mysterious, and you do like to be in you're own world and I love that about you, but the truth is Edward....You are just in Denial. You left Kristin, the woman that gave her heart & soul to you, not because you wanted to protect her, but you were running away from the fact that you're really Gay. And u know what?? That's totally ok! The only reason why you THINK you're in love with me is because I have such manly, & powerful characteristics that you admire, that you aspire to be like. So you're not really in love with me, Edward. You just want to BE LIKE ME! But the truth is, You're Gay Edward & we still all love you just the same. Now that you know this, you can move on with you're live much happier! Maybe you and that other Vampire dude can get together cuz I think he might be gay as well! Good Luck Edward. We will always be here to Support you!"

Edward, with a new found respect for me and the new realization of who he really is, was quiet for a second, and then slowly gave me a smile. A smile that you have never seen Edward do before! He has accepted that this really is the truth!

"Thank you Tila! You have really helped me come out! Thanks so much buddy!" then gives me a "bro-hug" then Edward starts skipping away to go find his real love...the other vampire dude and live happily ever after!
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