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Why aren't there bullet-proof pants?

Harry: "Then they slapped this bullet proof vest on me and gave me a gun."
Lloyd: "But what if he shot you in the face?"
Harry: "What if they shot me in the face?"
Beth Jordan: "That's a risk we were willing to take."
-Dumb & Dumber

If you could be one starwars character who would it be?

Luke in The Empire Strikes Back. It's the best one of the bunch. Because he made out with his sister? Possibly.

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"?

This makes me want to vomit.

What is you're best friends name?

Kelsy

...and what annoys you most about them?

She's such a tease.

What do you wear in bed?

Usually whatever I wore that day.

If you spend all this time on a PC, does that mean you are the geek in your family?
No, one of my brothers is far worse.
You are in a boat made for two watchin Sadam Hussein and George Micheal drowning, who do you save?
George!

Have you ever had your heart broken?

I don't have a heart.

What one thing would you change about your body/personality?
I would make a much better man than I do a woman. That's no joke.