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Sometimes, it's not just YOU. (you you you you you you you YOUUUU!) . But a process. Something relatable to human nature. Doesnt that make things feel better? But what you do with yourself adds.
My mother and older brother revealed stints of over-anxiety in their twenties. It made me wonder if it was simply a general enactment of genetic processing that I was enduring. But you know...my environment was foolish. Too much E, whiskey and speed. So it was like I took an overly sensitive nervous system and pounded it into the dirt. I believe in all this because of how long of a recovery I've had to take. It's taken a LOT to recover.
I dont know what lifestyle you have. But even more basic dietary misalignments can cause disarray in ultra sensitive ecosystems.
I'm searching for a point, and I think it's in how my family has nervous issues. Sometimes you simply grow out of it. And then from that, sometimes a person reacts by adding. I think I've tried to shock myself into changing away from my circumstances. That if I didnt know what I wanted, that by traumatizing myself, I'd somehow develop something useful and binding out of necessity. But forcing myself hasnt worked. It's merely excuses, like silent noise.
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