[!@#$%!]

luxy: about your post above: i gues you have to get downright mean when people can't take a hint. make yourself unpleasant. you have to most blatantly shoo them away.

now, funny thing, i reread your posts and you seem to be all over the art dude ha ha ha. just go with it & see what happens. you cant really plan out your whole life-- you have to take chances, etc.

this reminds me btw of my first "serious" girlfriend, we were 17, in college (we have shorter highschools) and seriously into each other. agter a year ahd a half i chickend out cos i was young and curious and not ready to commit. did shit hit the fan? of course. did i have to see her and be in class with her, considering our first year we had all our courses together. and i had to see her for the next 3 years. but that's life, people often move in small social circles anyway.

which brings me to my other point-- aren't you going to a different college next year? i wouldnt worry much about what to do after a breakup, but about what to do if things get heavy and you gotta leave.

but there's no use in worrying really. life is an adventure. keep crazies away and take care of yourself and you should be mostly ok.

and you might want to talk with someone (in person) about that mild ptsd you have. if you're still haunted by it, you're not ok. get that out of your system if possible...