[schizophrenicroom]

Samuel L Jackson is sitting with Kurt and chatting. Samuel stops and starts to look at Greg Norton from a distance.

Kurt: Yeah I think the new Zombie Nirvana tour is gonna be good.
Samuel: It's gonna be....
Kurt: What's wrong?
Samuel: OH MY GOD THERE'S A SNAKE ON GREG'S FACE!
Kurt: Yikes.
J/Patti: There are snakes on this motherfuckin plane!
Danza: There is Tony Danza on this motherfuckin plane!

Awkward silence again.

Thurston: Serioulsy, can sombody shut Tony up?
Kim: Wait! That's not a snake.
Samuel: Yeah it is There are snakes...
Lee: It's just his moustache.
Samuel: Oh.

The plane has a sigh of relief until the masked Nixon is seen.

Watt: It's Nixon!
Rollins: Who is gonna stop him?

Grant Hart rises from his seat and puts on his wrestling attire.

Grant: There is only one man who can catch him and that's Grant "The Hitman" Hart baby!

Dave Grohl gets up to take a vicious girl dump. When he walks in he finds Lee tied up still in his blue catsuit.

Dave: Lee what's up!
Lee: mmalhf!
Dave: Yeah, I like Frosted Flakes too.

Patti walks in.

Patti: Oh the only way to express my views of this situation is to dance barefoot on dishes.
Watt: Has anybody else noticed that Patti looks like that singer of Dinosaur Jr.?
Mould: No.
Watt: Oh.
Dave: Who would tie up Lee and buttsex the Shat Attack?

The masked Nixon then stands up.

Nixon: You want some bitches?
Da Game: Ah hell na son? You betta beez notz callin out Da Game. Da Game is gonna Kill ya!

Nixon pulls out his pistol and shoots Da Game 24 times in the nipple.

Da Game: Ah na! I got shot by a cracka!
Nixon: Who else wants some buttsecks kickin?
Grant Hart: take off your pants, let’s wrestle.

Grant Hart has Nixon ready to be put in the sharpshooter but Nixon reaches in his trunks and throws purple glitter in his eyes.

Grant Hart: I've been blinded again!
The Ref: ONE...TWO...THREE! DING DING! THE WINNER AND STILL HUSKERS ON A PLANE CHAMPION...RICHARD NIXON!
Thurston: Nobody can stop Nixon!!! There is no hope!

Suddenly the plane begins to move violently.

The Shat: I can't control the plane!
Patti: Little sister the sky is falling....



*Nixon marches out of the bathroom, looking rather delighted and maniacal*

Nixon: FOOLS! LISTEN TO ME! This plane is gonna go down.
Steve: Nooooo! *grabs broomstick from under seat*
Patti Smith: There's something with the plane. *scoots close to Thurston*
Thurston: lol patti can feel it in her bones
Kim: Oh, lord.
Nixon: I DECLARE MYSELF LORD SUPREMACY OF THIS PLANE.

*CHUCK NORRIS EMERGES OUT OF A CLOUD OF PINK SMOKE, INEXPLICABLY HOLDING A CAN OF 'WHOOPASS'*

Chuck Norris: Did somebody say... PLANE? *grabs belt buckle and makes a stone cold CHUCK NORRIS FACE*
Nixon: You damn right. I'm not a crook.
Chuck Norris: O RLY?
Nixon: YA RLY.

*CHUCK NORRIS DOES A VARIETY OF KARATE ACTS TO KILL NIXON, AND INTRODUCES GYMNASTIC ACTS LIKE STRADDLE JUMPS AND ROUND-OFF BACKHANDSPRINGS TO KICK HIM IN THE FACE AND SHOW OFF HIS NEW PINK LEOTARD WITH PICTURES OF UNICORNS.*

Chuck: Take this, beezatch! *round-house kicks*
Steve: My wand! You broke my wand!
Lee: Here, Steve. *hands him a new wand*
Chuck: This is no place for charms! This is only a place for my gymnastic and karate expertise. My tapes sell for 19.95 each if you feel so inclined to learn the ways of my dojo.
Bob Mould: I don't know what you're talking about!




*Nixon gets up off the floor. He looks angry. He tries to attack *