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Criticism is about personal taste, for god's sake.
You just get to know someone whose tastes you respect and who can give an accurate description of the music as viewed through his or her individual prism, or on the flipside of that, someone whose tastes are so opposed to your own that you can almost be guaranteed to love everything they hate.
Reading good criticism requires some active participation on the part of the reader. People get down on critics, but some of the people I mentioned earlier in the thread are directly responsible for huge contributions to my musical life by pointing my head down several fascinating and very deep rabbitholes.
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