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-   -   i'm drunk and lets talk about exes that you can't get over (http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/showthread.php?t=23247)

acousticrock87 07.07.2008 11:52 AM

I always try to wait 1/4 the time I was with the person before getting someone else. That usually avoids any questioable situations later on.

uhler 07.07.2008 11:56 AM

sometimes i'm over my recent ex but sometimes i'm not. i think it has to do with that we're not at the friends stage yet. with most of my exes i have to be friends with them after we break up (unless they fucked me over big time). i guess i'm different than most people on here.

oh yeah and i'm not over my ex when i get drunk obviously.

acousticrock87 07.07.2008 12:00 PM

Not too different. I'm waiting to get to the friends stage with my recent ex, but it's only been a few weeks so we're not really talking yet. I'd rather be friends with her eventually, but it was too clean a break. I still feel like we have a shot and stuff, and ya know. Best to let things heal and move on before you think about getting back together, take an objective stance. So we're not friends yet.

uhler 07.07.2008 12:11 PM

in happier drunk news. i got really drunk the other day and met this dude that drummed for swans and the guy that the beastie boys song egg raid on mojo is about.

demonrail666 07.07.2008 12:12 PM

Which Swans drummer was it?

sarramkrop 07.07.2008 12:13 PM

I feel a bit apprehensive because my ex is coming back from Australia next February 'cause he finish his studies, and we get on well. One part of me misses him and doesn't mind meeting up for a drink or two, the other is nervous about telling him that I don't miss being his boyfriend anymore.

terriblecanyons 07.07.2008 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZEROpumpkins
Note to self, do not date terriblecanyons



Awww. Naw, he's just a jerk. I'm not a bitch to all men, I promise :)

MellySingsDoom 07.07.2008 01:30 PM

The best way to mend a broken heart is to have a big, selfish, I'm-gonna-buy-what-I-want frenzy. No more having to compromise on stuff you want. A winner every time!

demonrail666 07.07.2008 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MellySingsDoom
The best way to mend a broken heart is to have a big, selfish, I'm-gonna-buy-what-I-want frenzy. No more having to compromise on stuff you want. A winner every time!


LOL. Cornford amp.

acousticrock87 07.07.2008 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MellySingsDoom
The best way to mend a broken heart is to have a big, selfish, I'm-gonna-buy-what-I-want frenzy. No more having to compromise on stuff you want. A winner every time!

I agree, but you need money for that.

That being said, this forum is so small and cute on my new iTouch. I'm gonna go check out the Post Pictures of Hot Girls thread...I can't wait...

ithinkimissyou 07.07.2008 04:01 PM

My name should give away that I went through a phase of not being able to get over an ex ladyfriend type (and that I'm a fan of a certain Irish band, but hey..)

Anyway.

In my experience, time helps but it also causes causes a lot of the anger and bitterness to fade, leaving you wondering why the fuck you split up in the first place. So if you haven't got another person in your life, inevitably you wind up pining for what/who you once had cause all the bad things that happened now seem trite and meaningless.

At this point, it's worthwhile pointing out some sagely advice I got a few years back, which I stupidly ignored. Don't make the same mistake:

The best way to get over someone, is to get under someone else

I ignored that advice. Cue a 5 year merry go round, where I'd hook up with my ex girlfriend (generally during the spring/summer), we'd have a hopelessly romantic and brilliant time, until Autumn arrived and she'd gradually get bored of me and either by accident or design, start an argument, or do something which really pissed me off.

So we'd break up, not talk, sometimes for 6 months or more. Till the next year, a text or phonecall, or call to the doorstep would come out of the blue. And next thing you know we're on a train to the atlantic coast having a great time... Till autumn.

Stir and repeat.

Well, eventually, gradually, this cycle became clear to me. And then there was a final period of bullshit, were we ultimately ended, I'd had enough. That'll be two years ago this year. We haven't talked in all that time, but we ran into each other about two months ago and had one of those horrible "how are you/i am good" conversations. My brain was utterly blank.

There's a lot of things she did over the years which really fucking infuriated me, but seeing her after all that time, none of them were on my mind. Ever have one of those times were you construct this brilliant thorough speech in your head, with the aim of delivering it to your ex, which perfectly surmises your feelings? If so forget it. It's meaningless once you lay eyes on them.

At the same time though.. the love and passion was gone.

I should have known early on it was never going to work out, but I stuck at it, hoping it would. Until eventually I reached the point were I was just sticking at it out of stubborness; the feelings I'd had were gone.

So my advice: Don't keep torturing yourself with this ex, if it didn't work out the first time, there's a good chance it'll never work out. If you must persue her, to try one last time, do. If she doesn't appear interested; give up. If she is but it doesn't ultimately work out, give up, move on. Life is too short to dedicate time to a relationship that will in all likelyhood never function properly. And besides at that point any sane persons belief in the long term viability of the relationship should be shot.

Go out, have a life, meet new people. It's fun.

greedrex 07.07.2008 04:09 PM

 

Trasher02 07.07.2008 04:16 PM

I think I'll be in love with my crush forever, I serioulsy can't get rid of her and I've tried anything... And god it sucks ass.

greedrex 07.07.2008 04:29 PM

ok let's be serious, just for a couple of minutes.
I felt several times that the girl i was with was THE woman.
Three names come to mind.
For each i really messed myself up, trying all sorts to get back with them one way or another, being aboslutely SURE that my life would be FUCKED UP forever if i ever lost the girl.
That one particular girl made me discover SY when i was about 18 (13 years ago, that is). We stayed together on and off for 4 years.
I really went down the hole for a good couple of years after we split up. I'm talking tough shit, nervous breakdown, total chaos, the hardest of times.
Eventually i'm thankful that all happened to me because now i'm real happy with a beautiful wife and a lovely kid!!!!!!!
just to say, get over it, do sports, meet new people, go travel for a bit, see new things, get EXPERIENCED (hehehehehe)
you may eventually find out that the hard times paved the way for a bright future
i sound so full of myself and twatty!!!!!twat twat
 

Everyneurotic 07.07.2008 05:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ithinkimissyou
...had one of those horrible "how are you/i am good" conversations...


this is one of the worst things i have experienced in life, hope i don't get to experience it again.

----

one of the few things i've learned, though, is that you can't force remaining friends with exes; if it doesn't happen naturally, then there's no point.

getting over, you really have to make a big effort, i think.

crprte.idnty 07.07.2008 05:43 PM

I've never had a problem with getting over exes. I don't burn bridges. I turn into Godzilla and burn down the fucking city.

Cantankerous 07.07.2008 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crprte.idnty
I've never had a problem with getting over exes. I don't burn bridges. I turn into Godzilla and burn down the fucking city.

well done!
Quote:

Originally Posted by floatingslowly
it's really not wise to download any .exes.

you never know when they might actually be spyware.

and yes, they ARE hard to get rid of.

advice: get a mac. you'll never regret it.




i will have a rly hard time getting beyond senor cantankerous if we ever go separate ways. because i love him. more than i love anyone else. i love him more than i love members of my family.

terriblecanyons 07.07.2008 06:56 PM

macs suck.

ZEROpumpkins 07.07.2008 07:01 PM

Yes indeedeo

Cantankerous 07.07.2008 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by terriblecanyons
macs suck.

blasphemy

if you want a ridiculous amount of hassle and extreme risk for viruses, you can have it.


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