Robe. Signs To Southern Lord!
 

Holy fuck guys...

I thought the upcoming "Bleak" on Crucial Blast was a major thing, I thought being in this month's Rue Morgue Magazine was a major thing, I thought being featured in an 8 page spread in Italy's Blow-Up Magazine was a major thing, I thought being in the Wire was a major thing, but nothing is as big as this..

Southern Lord emailed us and wants us to totally put out a limited-to-50-copies vinyl release, with glow-in-the-dark ink, foil embossed letter, with the art done exclusively by Takeshi Kitano (my hero!). He's going to paint something really dark. We just whipped up the album in about an hour (we simply pitched down some Sunn recordings), and we're calling it "Decomposition of the Bile's Vomit Remnants: Droneology Volume Deux".

The problem with ordering a copy is, they're already sold out even before we put them out, but I'll put a few copies on ebay in a year and sell them for a couple grand a piece.

We're also going on tour with EARTH, SUNN, MOON, MARS, URANUS, SATURN, TOOL.

[edited so I don't get yelled at]

We're doing a collab with MIKE PATTON, where we watch him silently sitting alone in a room for 80 minutes, except at one point he makes the sound "FAOLEJGLEIWJGESLIGJSELIJGS" and then farts at one point.

Most of all, we're working with our heroes WOLF EYES, who are going to take our recordings and run them through 50 pedals and make them sound brutal, harsh, power electronics, and the freakdom.

Oh fuck, I just got another email, saying that OMAR RODRIGUEZ LOPEZ SHAKESPREARE MAO ZADONG CHE GUEVERRA ABRACADABRA JUNIOR THE FIFTH wants to lay down 20 guitar solos (at the same time) on our next album.

I'm going to be too busy to post here anymore, so from now on.. I gave Sway, Genteel Death, Satan, EveryNeurotic, and westernquinox my account information, and they're going to take turns posting under my name to keep the "Rep points" quotient high for my eventual return.

Thanks for all the help, guys! Without people like infinitemusic telling me I don't know anything about music, it never would have helped me to actually succeed at something!

...but before all this happens..

coming soon:

I want 51 copies of the SL release.
Oh wait, they're pressing just 50...
Ah, then I don't want it.

































;).

AWESOME!
























Happy April Fools' everyone.

Well, I got the test pressing, it's on a new invented color that falls somewhere between the blackest black to ever exist and "black with a hint of dark grey". It comes with Robe. trading cards, kinda like old baseball cards, with statistics and shit for each member of the band. Cool idea, I think, it also comes with some Robe. bubblegum, that has "psychadelic properties". Only in the test pressing though.

...now, the JAPANESE REISSUE of the album is what's really going to be special, we've actually went back and re-wrote the Bible, BY HAND, and changed all the references of God to Satan, and all references of Jesus to Robe. Hand-written. In blood. By hand.

R.I.P., sellouts. W_-V

Aw, I was hoping it would come with an actual robe with an actual period stain on it.

The next southern lord release will be a Robe. robe. It'll be made of nothing but brand-new Robe. cd's, connected to make the robe. You can wear it around town and when you feel like listening to cd # 78, just take it off the part where you tie the Robe. together. You might then be naked and exposed, but it'll be worth it to hear some high quality doom drone.

Well done Adam!

Congrats!

So are you going to grow your hair for the big tour?

I heard Greg Ginn joined your band to play guitar solos.

Dude that's fucking Boss!!!

Congrats!!

Let me know when the Elisa Ambrogio collab comes out.

ahaha.

yeah, he's been hitting the fucking BONG again.

so you know it's going to be some of his legendary, wacky, wrong-note "jazz" solos for 2 hours!