Youtube and instrument masturbation.
 

Ahem. I wanted to start a thread for youtube videos of people masturbating on their instruments. Like so or Like so or perhaps Like so.

I'll post some other things that are non-guitarry in a bit. I personally can happily watch a lot of these things, and it pains me somewhat. The last one I must've watched lots and lots. Shocking.

that mayavi bloke is shocking, and one playing the super mario stuff is wasting his life even worse than us fools on the internet

Grimace overdose!!!!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JLdVkoKNToE

Here is something exceedingly atrocious. After four minutes you'd think it's the end of the song, but no, it keeps going for another five minutes. Painful.

good jerk-off:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wqb1UPmOMgA

The third guy reminds me of a not so good friend back home who spent all his teenage years learning Slayer and Metallica note by note.It goes without saying that he's a wanker in person and on his guitar.

Literally.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UElLscFdnKY

this one is ridiculous. i couldn't stomach that prince one.

Shitter than that

Violinists are always better than guitarists

the thing i've noticed with japs is either they get things perfectly right (haino, melt banana & the like) or are just so horrible and corny that you wish the whole nation would be destroyed by godzilla again.

This is brilliant. I love the sort of people who spent the whole of the 80s practising their shredding only to find that it fell out of favour. Now they're in their 40s and doing exactly this. I am genuinely impressed with this on the level of hand/ eye co-ordination, but absolutely no grasp of anything other than how to shred like a very shreddy shred of shredded wheat.

i saw better busking violinist than that recently in trafalgar square, he had this led zeppelin and herbie hancock playing midi device and to which he playing these absurd and rocking electric violin solos over

Sometimes it comes out the other side to being brilliant again. My J-pop knowledge is lacking, but I've heard some utterly awesome things that are corny as the Gods of corn themselves.

The tubes have thrown up a few of them. A couple of prickish fawning smug violinists, but also some beautiful Romanian children who look like the music is their soul and everyone walking past is ACTUALLY TREADING on their ACTUAL SOUL. Brilliance.

And, back to the matter at hand, drum solos

I only included the second one because it amused me that it was next to the first when I searched for drum solos. Brilliantly crap.

i belive that he is the official worst
the one and only micheal angelo batio (wait till 1 minute 57 seconds)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qG74eVb6V10

here's a guitar lesson from the excruciating ywingwe malmsteen

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTowzVb2PII

Arguably worse Michael Angelo. Actually, no arguing about it, it's comically awful.

I still quite enjoy Malmsteen, the racist pigfucker. I'm going to need some very stupid happy hardcore to purge myself of all the fretwanking I've watched today.

dammit, someone already mentioned michael angelo batio.
there were some hilarious videos on youtube of a czech or polish (i think) guitar wanker playing a double neck, but i don't remember his name... does anybody know?


i'l just metion eddie van halen here, because nobody else has and few guitar wnakers get to play for such large audiences
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eJgRJ15XzI

Martha Argerich

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uh-Li6cXuV0