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-   -   Favorite Man from the Old Testament/Torah (http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/showthread.php?t=8782)

SpectralJulianIsNotDead 12.07.2006 11:16 PM

Favorite Man from the Old Testament/Torah
 
Pick one! :P

luxinterior 12.08.2006 04:47 AM

Thomas Jefferson.

king_buzzo 12.08.2006 04:48 AM

whats a bible?

Glice 12.08.2006 07:50 AM

I went for Job because he's got the most comical, although honorable mention goes to Abraham Infanticide.

cuetzpalin 12.08.2006 07:54 AM

other -- dalila!

Gulasch Noir 12.08.2006 08:36 AM

Stupidly I didn't give a shit about religious education, when I was at school. I regret that, because that was a very interesting period from an historical view.

Inhuman 12.08.2006 09:39 AM

I always liked Lot. It's a cool name

luxinterior 12.08.2006 09:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Inhuman
I always liked Lot. It's a cool name


He married salt. Or at least what was to become salt.

atari 2600 12.08.2006 12:32 PM

The Torah is only the first five books of the OT. SpectralJulian already knows this, no doubt, so I'm just clarifying for others that may be reading.

Other


Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the Fiery Furnace

Eve
Lucifer ---and the snake in the garden
prophets--Ezekiel, Elijah, and Daniel
old guys---Methuselah, Zachariah
Enoch

My favorite is Ezekiel or Daniel.
Actually, the best authors are whoever wrote the Book of Job and one of King David's sons (unidentified any further) that wrote Ecclesiastes. Solomon and David supposedly wrote Proverbs.
Then comes David, who wrote Psalms.

fishmonkey 12.08.2006 12:41 PM

Bill Gates

atari 2600 12.08.2006 01:30 PM

Bart: Oh boy! Free trading cards!
Milhouse: Wow! Joseph of Arimathea! Twenty six conversions in A.D. 46.
Nelson: Whoa, a Methuselah rookie card!
Flanders: Heh heh, well boys, who'd have thought learning about religion could be fun?
Bart: Religion?
Milhouse: Learning?
Nelson: Let's get out of here!

- "Homer's Barbershop Quartet"

atari 2600 12.08.2006 01:38 PM

At the Flanders' house, everyone sits in a circle on the living room floor.

Ned: Well, children, it's Saturday night. So, what say we let our hair down and play "Bombardment"?
Bart+Lisa: Yay!
Ned: ..."Of Bible Questions!"
Rod+Todd: Yay!
Ned: Which version shall it be?
Todd: St. James!
Rod: The Vulgate of St. Jerome!
[Ned looks through the Bible bookcase]
Ned: "Vulgate" it is.
Todd: [disappointed] Aw.
Ned: OK, for one gold star, what Persian king exempted the Levites from taxation?
Rod: Artaxerxes!
Ned: Righty-o!
[licks a star, sticks it on Rod's face]

Much later, Todd and Rod are covered with stars (and Todd even coughs up
some), Maggie has a star, and Maude has two. She looks worriedly at Ned.

Ned: Well...?
Todd: I know!
Ned: No, son, we've got to let Bart and Lisa get one. Come on, this one's easy.
Lisa: [pause] We give up.
Ned: Well, guess! Book of Revelations, fire-breathing lion's head, tail made out of snakes...who else is it going to be?
Bart: [unsure] Jesus?
Ned: [yelling] Je...Jes...don't you kids know anything? The Serpent of Rehaboam?
[the kids look blank]
The Well of Zohassadar?
[the kids look blank]
The Bridal Feast of Beth Chedruharazzeb?
Maude: Wait. That's the kind of thing you should start learning at baptism.
Lisa: Um, ahem, actually, you see, ahem, we were never baptised.[Ned groans and faints]
Maude: Oh! Neddy? Neddy? [waves smelling salts under him] Neddy!
Ned: [wakes up] No, that ain't gonna do it. [faints again]

- "Home Sweet Home-Diddily-Dum-Doodily"

8=======================D 12.08.2006 02:00 PM

Cain of course! others are too much kind and wise.

EMMAh 12.08.2006 03:19 PM

I know nothing about the bible nor do I really care.

Hip Priest 12.08.2006 06:21 PM

Aaron.

I would like to add that my favourite person from the whole of the Old Testament (as opposed to the Torah) would be the female Esther.

krastian 12.09.2006 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bytor Peltor
I was afraid NBA point guard Steve Nash might suffer the same effects as Samson since Nash cut his hair during the off season. Mr. Nash is playing well this year and is in position to win his third straight NBA Most Valuable Player award.

Last night, Mr. Nash hit a three pointer at the end of regulation to tie the game and send it to overtime. In the second overtime, Mr. Nash hit two free throws and Phoenix won by four......covering the -3 my friends & I had with the bookie man for $400 - SWEET!!!

Hell yeah man......the Suns have been my team since the Barkley/Majerle/Johnson/Ainge days.


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