So I was at school the other day...
 

...when I stopped off at the bathroom before class. So I'm in the stall unbuttoning my jeans when I see a folded-up $20 bill sitting on top of the toilet paper dispenser. So I get very excited for a moment, that is, until I unfold the bill and find out that it is not real. And not only is it not real, it also has printed on it some stuff about Jesus and how my reward in heaven is greater than that of a $20 bill. Now, all I want to ask is, WHAT KIND OF PERSON DOES THIS? Please, enlighten me, if you will. Do they think that I or someone else will find this sort of tactic amusing? Obviously they've just assumed that we're all lost souls in need of saving or some other trash, without any thought that perhaps I've been raised Catholic and I don't need one more person telling me shit about God, and that finding a very real-looking fake $20 bill is going to be more disappointing and make me feel more resentful toward God and "his people" than anything else? But mainly I want to know who does this sort of thing, so if you know the answer, please share it with me. Also, why can't these people keep their religion out of my school? I don't understand the point for them where church and service work become not enough and they have to venture outward and disappoint people with fake $20 bills. I can only think that this sort of thing is mean. Not funny, not cute, not clever, but mean. Most of the people who go to my school aren't financially secure and could really use an extra $20 here and there. It really has become the difference between whether I eat a proper meal for lunch (for once) instead of settling for a tiny bag of chips from the vending machine and a trip to the water fountain. Really, what's the deal?

i found some christian comics in the bathroom of a cafeteria yesterday, the best part is that at the very very end of the preaching and promises of redemption and happiness in the after life, it says "buy the book by some greedy moron that will help you be a better christian" and in the back of the comic, it says that if you want some samples to spread the word of jesus to the people, to send $12.95 to somewhere in california and to get in touch with your local representative if in somewhere else in the world.

i collect all that crap, i find it really amusing. that $20 bill sounds more like a mean prank. i like the other pamphlets i got from ny this summer where they are disguised as publicity for dr phil's book but then turns into "jesus this, heaven that, repent, send me $50, blah blah".

The bill had a web site on it and everything. I was so upset that I didn't commit it to memory. But I did toss the thing in the trash.

I had a million dollar bill that told me I was an thieving adulterous liar and that I need to repent. Then it said "Read your bible and obey it."

ha ha ha that was an awesome prank, a pity it was wasted on some evangelist shit.

did you pick the thing with your bare hands? i'm a bit of a germaphobe. i'd check that thing up close first.

idea: retool for more evil purposes?

I've cleaned up so much barf and other bodily fluids on the job (thank you Six Flags) over the summer that the germ thing doesn't really bother me anymore as long as I know I can wash my hands afterward. I was the only girl at those rides who could clean up that stuff without feeling ill so I got stuck doing it most of the time.

ha ha ha-- DAMN

nerves of steel

I found a 50 dollar bill once. A real one.

Fuck, I HATE shit like this.
When you have no real option but to simply get rid of it, and there is really no action you could do that makes up for how fucking retarded the asshole that did it is.
A while ago these fucking cunts literally set up a table outside of our school and handed out fucking bibles.Like, right outside the main doors of the school. What the fuck did they expect, people to be all stoked about it, "Ahh fuck yeah! These guys have dedication, let's follow them!"
Well, they got more "Fuck you"s, "Go to hell"s, and torn pages of their precious fucking bible than they could ever possibly imagine. I did express my sincerest "Fuck you."

Outside of my school, a few weeks ago, these two old men were handing out copies of the New Testament, right in front of the main entrance. Through those doors, there's a big trash can, and on that day it was filled to the brim with these little New Testaments. It did make sculpture class interesting that day though, because we had amassed so many of these things that we were able to put some of them through the toaster and get creative with all the others. I think one lady in class was offended, but it's better than just letting them sit there in the trash.

I usually throw it out, especially when they give it to me. I throw it out in front of them. Especially after I told them a thousand times I don't want it.

I remember some christians were passing out condoms at my high school so we started blowing them up and tossing them around. My smartass friends and I started hitting on our female friends in front of the christians about how we wanted to fuck them with our large, uncircumcised penis with no protection in front of our pagan idols. One came over to us and gave us a good witnessing.

I'm sympathetic toward Christianity because that's how I grew up. We went to church every Sunday, Catholic school for 12 years, that stuff really adds up. So, even though I am offended when other people draw conclusions about those of us who really had no choice when it came to our religious upbringing, I know that I make the same judgments about other people who were raised in a similar way. Really, very little of what I've experienced throughout my life has made me grow fonder of my religion. Most of it has done the exact opposite. The way it makes people act, I just can't understand. In the past I've thought that I would never really be content until I was able to either totally reject or accept Catholicism, but obviously it's more of a grey area, and I think for the rest of my life it will be that grey area. I'm not really the sort of person whose beliefs are easily changed by a profound experience, because what is typically defined as profound is something that wouldn't leave much of an impression on me, at least not one that would later influence my religious beliefs (or lack thereof).

when people hand me religious pamphlets i make them into paper airplanes.


"jesus plane!!!"

well having been raised catholic too i have to say though, not all "christians" are the same. while i was brought up with the knowledge that martin luther and henry VIII were as close to the antichrist as you can get, i've learn to have some appreciation for certain protestant denominations, and the relatively progressive ideas of some protestants i've met.

however--

evangelicals are a bunch of freaky lunatics with all sorts of demented ideas, and religious freedom notwithstanding, they are a serious threat to modern civilization.

I found this thing in a lecture theatre a couple of years ago, it was weird as anything, and i showed it to my freind who is a Christian (the Ok kind, i.e. the ones who think being Gay is fine and Creationism is a convenient and lazy way of explaining the unkowable) and they just laughed.

Its called a Chick Tract
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chick_tract
Like a comic, but it insists you believe it all. So these things have spread across to England too.

Honestly, it is difficult for me to associate Evangelicals with Christianity as I know it. But yes, you are correct.

Despite having to do an RE exam back at school, I'm totally uneducated in the different religious beliefs, probably why I hate the idea of any kind of god or gods. I find it annoying that someone would want to spread their religion, try to convince you of its power, especially when they try and sell it to you with a fake $20 bill. It's like that shit UK army recruitment advert on the TV, it's so sordid.

the problem is that it's them bitches who more loudly proclaim themselves and their ideals as "christian" and in doing so have coopted the word, to the point that it reflects poorly on other more sane branches of christianity.

these days, by virtue of this language trick, to say "im christian" is tantamount to declare "im a supertitious religious nut who wants to live in a theocracy".

it's the same shit that the republicans did with the word "liberal"-- they made it something like being a criminal.

these word games are the bread and butter of the ongoing culture wars. which the sane rational people are losing to the propaganda machinery of doom.

They were filming.

Did you have your pants down? That could be embarrassing.

I eventually had my pants down. At least I didn't shit.

(Note: Pooping at school is the weirdest thing I have ever heard of).

jesus is a counterfeiter! :eek:

As someone religious, yet who isn't (I hope) a 'fucking cunt', and whose religious friends are also not (in my opinion) 'fucking cunts', I would just like to say that the word 'evangelical' has been hijacked and damaged just as much as 'liberal' has.

'Evangelical' really refers to the more-or-less essential attempts by a Christian to share the gospel with non-Christians. Many have abused the word, but they have, more fundamentally, abused the word 'Christian'. We are warned of these people in the Bible (the epistle of Jude, verse 4, springs to mind: For certain men whose condemnation was written about[b] long ago have secretly slipped in among you. They are godless men, who change the grace of our God into a license for immorality and deny Jesus Christ our only Sovereign and Lord.).

It's easy to try to silence people and tell them they should not speak, or just to bully and abuse, but fortunately most of us still live in countries where that sort of nasty dictatorial nonsense isn't yet practiced.

In Manchester recently, the local Muslims had put up a tent in the city centre. They shared beliefs, food and discussion with anyone who cared to join in, and it was a really good effort. I'm often handed stuff by jewish, Muslim and Buddhist groups, and I have to say that in most cases there is a genuine attempt between all parties to be tolerant and interested in each other's faith. The need to tear up each other's holy books, call each other 'fucking cunts' or issue command such as 'go to hell' and 'fuck off' are thankfully felt to be unnecessary. It's a good job that most people, religious or atheist, are more tolerant than some would like.

you really shouldn't be so offended. When I was walking home from school once years ago I found a sticker on the floor that said "Smash Jew Conspired Communism and Anti-Christ Race Mixing" and in even bigger print "HEY NIGGER GOD IS WHITE!"

the scariest part was that I am in Los Angeles and the sticker had a local mailing address and phone number for info. At the time, I thought that kinda shit only existed in south carolina...

I beg to differ. What really bothered me about the whole thing was how anyone could think that such a method is even appropriate. "Hey, I'm going to make you think for a split second that you can actually afford to pay for gas this week without having to dip into the money you normally use for food and other groceries. And then I'm going to yank that hope away from you with my bullshit recruiting tactics, with no thought that you might have heard all of this before, repeatedly, IN CHURCH AND/OR SCHOOL FOR THE PAST TWO DECADES." There are better ways of "spreading the Good News," I would hope.

Amen.

There certainly are.

I do hope that I didn't offend you with any of my posts, because I value your opinion on topics such as this one. You always approach these things in a very level-headed way, which will lend a nice balance to a thread like this wherein I am basically generalizing left and right because of a number of things that have occurred in the past few months relating to religion and it kind of sent me over the edge after the $20 bill thing. Money is tight, I really am broke, and I can't even begin to understand how a Christian person could think that it is okay to deceive someone like that and actually expect it to go over well with the person who ends up finding it.

No, no, of course you haven't. Your posts are pretty much uniformly brilliant.

I was thinking more of the students at k-krack's school. Tearing up Bibles and throwing abuse is moronic. I fail to see why some types of bigotry are cool. It's the same kind of hatred that racists and xenophobes use.

You're right about the con, too. There is no room for deception or dishonesty in Christianity.

What's wrong with giving out free contraception? What's wrong with helping to prevent unwanted pregnancy and equally unwanted STD's? Christians get enough slagging off due to our alleged total opposition to pre-marital sex. These people were at least showing that intolerance isn't always the case.

i collect those pamphlets and flyers and stuff because i think their recruiting methods are absurd and many of those people are more interested in getting their hands in someone's money than in getting them into their chosen spiritual path.

nothing wrong with christians or catholics or anybody really. i don't get the evangelical part of christianity, though, i understand what it is and why they do it, but i just don't get how a person think it's their mission to get people to think alike.

You act as though we were counter-protesting them.

We were smartass high school students goofing around.

Fair enough.

Never go a church that asks for money before it offers fellowship.

Never go to a church that pressures you on how much to give, or demands to know how much you give.

And my advice is to be suspicious of any ministry named after its minister.


Basically, it's because Jesus gave express instructions to spread the word, to go and take on the (difficult and often hateful) world with humility and kindness; and it's a theme that has run all the way through the Christian narrative ever since.

Apart from that, it's human nature to want to spread good news.

the thing is that judaism doesn't have that part on it's m.o., nor does islam or buddism, and yeah, christianity is more of a collective thought instead of a focus on the individual. i just don't get it, my way of being for everything is "this is good for me but it's up to you if you want to give it a try".

then again, i know jewish people who can't stop trying to get to talk to anybody about their beliefs in hopes of converting them, something that doesn't get in my head more than evangelism.

It's really just based on what Jesus instructed; there's a natural feeling (and desire) to sense that you are being sent out. But the issue should never be forced against people's will, because that's not the true Christian way.

Personally, of course, I love talking to religious people of any faith, because I think that we can learn a lot from each other. Doctrine put to one side, others' words about the actual seeking, discovery and maintaining of faith can be immensely helpful. Jewish people are great to talk to, I find. The only ones I kind of have problems with are the Mormons, who are always very nice but tend in my experience to lose interest in you as a person when it's clear that they can't convert you to their specific way of thought.

weird but i guess it's a strong feeling if you have it.

i sympathize with this post wholeheartedly.

What exactly do you learn?
Do you believe that everyone could become a better person if they were to believe in your religion?

well you may be right, and i don't know the kind of evangelical christianity that you practice, but on this side of the atlantic we have a number of clowns who have hijacked the brains of the populace for their own political and financial ends. you will usually find them hollering "jesus" and hallellujas in every other sentence, and asking you for money on the tv, and screaming about being born again. assholes such as (to name a few)

jerry falwell (fortunately now dead)
jim bakker (ex-convict)
oral roberts
jack van impe
pat robertson (the 700 club)
jimmy swaggart
etc

and many, many many others-- many because it's a profitable con and a political force-- oh yes. i just don't remember all the name.

then there are scary types that are not necessarily on TV but who preach some of the most backwards and superstitions fundamentalism such as the southern baptists (the largest protestant denomination in america).

and then there are all manner of well-intentioned people who willingly flush their brains down the toilet and interpret the "bible" literally. i put that word in quotation marks because you have your jewish bible and then you have the gospel and what is what depends on who you talk to.

as long as people keep their beliefs to themselves i really have no problem, but when they try to keep others from living their lives as they see fit it becomes a war, and in that sense i do see myself at war with these people.

i did not intent to include you or many other innocent people in these categorizations; i have many friends and acquaintances that are, broadly speaking, christian, but none of them (obviously) are the lunatic fanatics that i've described above.

anyway, i forgot where i was going with this, but i invite you to watch a little of one of the groups i love to hate. or.. wait wait... you might appreciate this. start with 1 and follow the rest...

these are 2 separate documentaries:

1) "bible bashers"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6U_B5SPkeNk

2) "the most hated family in america"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O228AQRvcqQ

then you'll realize what we're up against...

...fake 20$?
that's mighty rude



you are so brave/strong

I've seen the one ccalled "Most Hated Family In America." It was a really good documentary ..it made me kind of sad though, to know that people have that much hate in them, and that they use innocent children as bilboards for their propaganda and such. I'll check out the other one later seeing as how I have to go to bed soon and such.

That sucks about the $20 though, Lux. For all the reasons people mentioned. I really haven't had to deal with anything like that in my life thus far, except for these two old ladies who came to my door offering bible study, in which I refused and after they prodded more I just shut the door. I'm very interested in other beliefs (mostly ones that are ancient, though) and I'm willing to talk to other people and sometimes I even follow some of the "rules" they have that I think would make me a better person -though most of my morality comes from my own personal thinking and just general rules of society. There are a lot of relgions I want to learn more about, though. I'm in the (very slow) process of reading the bible from cover to cover, just for the sake of being able to argue it's validity and things better (because I like debating) and for my own personal knowledge. I'd like to learn more about Buddhism and Satanism, however.