i dont want you having dirty sex on my floor

Well I would, but er, that goes without saying. :p And by accommodate, I don't mean have my evil way with them. Honest.
(God, if they ever fall for that, I am so in...)

there are a few people i would accomodate with nary a doubt.

no way, fuck off assholes.

i don't even let my friends go inside my house, let alone stay here.

but don't worry, i could accomodate you somewhere, i have friends who run 24/7 free hotels but they call them "where i live".

in fact, if one of you jerks comes here and asks me to stay over, i'd probably call someone here and i would also go along to my friend's for the night

I bet you don't even let you in Everyneurotic Mansions sometimes! :D;)

ran out of places to hide the corpses?

haha

maybe.

I once ended up crashing at Porky's after I stupidly forget to catch the last tube and bus home. The poor sod still has nightmares about that, but I did buy him a bottle of vodka to seal the deal.

sometimes, sometimes i want to kick myself out of my own house.


i could squeeze them a bit more (what are they gonna do? bitch about it being too crammed?), the real problem is the smell. those taxi cab air freshners can take so much stench.

that and i don't want any of you fuckers near my shellac futurist lp. i'd take you drinking until the break of dawn and call you a cab to the airport.

ARE YOU - visiting London?
DO YOU - fancy a place to crash?
CAN YOU - endure several tiresome hours of your host playing you endless amount of vinyl/CDs that you'd rather chew your leg off than listen to?

Then come to Melly Towers!

Comfort - Ha ha ha.
Atmosphere - Smoky
Ambience - Fliddy
Customer Satisfaction - None.

As long as there's alcohol available, it sounds a lot better than other places I've crashed.
:rolleyes:

We have alcohol and ciggies galore here. And Pringles.

PRINGLES?! I'm in!

sign me up!

Right, we have 2 here for the Melly Endurance, er, Experience. Any more on board?

You had me with Pringles.

Also I have decided that I would let fellow boardies crash at my place
AFTER a rigorous screening process. I can't have anyone who would
steal or damage my formidable Snoopy collection.

I love snoopy!!!!!!!

Wow, Melly! You've actually met the Porkster? Is he as nice as he seems here?

terrible one:You are then a person of discriminating taste, and are invited to apply for a stay at Casa De Benningfield (or whatever the hell) whenever the need arises.

Yay!! I used to be obsessed with snoopy when I was about 2-4yrs. I watched every movie and every special and every episode and read every clip out from the funny papers, and I even had a giant snoopy doll about the size of me.

I was truly obsessed.

:D

He's actually a lovely fellow in real life, as it happens. :)

I don't doubt it.

to answer the initial question:

hell yeah, if i like you. no fucking way, if i don't.

i have a snoopy doll
it's not giant though

i'd hang out with melly and listen to him talk about the gigs he attended as a wee lad and listen to his endless collection of music.

i would, however, jump out the window once he insists on the genius of the ting tings, which is most likely inevitable.

Everyneuro - you got rep.

While you're round here, we could call up William Bennett and leave him rude phone messages. :D

have you ever considered a career in advertising?

Um, you probably won't believe this, but I actually did work in advertising for 4 years (office gopher, and training to be a copywriter). Dad Melly still works in the biz - he's currently working as a freelance writer for Ogilvy & Mather in London.

Needless to say, my Dad has all the writing talent in our family :o

that sounds like a phone party.

"hey mr bennett we're big fans and we just wanted to tell you that...YOU'RE A FUCKING PRICK!!! YES YOU ARE, FACIST CUNT, YOU THINK YOU'RE SMART? DO YOU?! DO YOU?! RAPE FOR PROGRESSIVE SOCIETIES IN THE LAND OF MASS ASSASSINS, DO YOU?! DO YOU?! FIST UP YOUR ARSE!! thanks".

i should officially be employed in ads and marketing, if i didn't hate it so much.

your dad must be good at bullshitting if he writes advertisements.

And that would end up as a lyric on the next Whitehouse album!

He's had (counts) 40 years experience of it. I don't think he remembers much of the 1970's, it was that good apparently :D

Note: He used to have framed in his study in the mid-80's a 3 page memo he wrote, which completely demolished this account handler fuckwit he used to have to deal with. I think he might have it stashed away somewhere still.

with the interview saying "i wrote it, i was inspired by the times we live in, not by any one person or not...our fans are cunts, you know?"

most of the people i know who were around back in the day said it was shit. i guess it depends on your situation.

Tis true - I think for my dad, decent wage + free booze + regular trips to New York + other things I won't mention here = yay for him in the 70's.

some, yes
others, no

Absolutely.

I might need a place to stay in New York, if I can accomplish that.

he he "YMCA" and stuff he he