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I need a cigarette.
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These little black shadows keep flitting about. As soon as I look at them, they disappear. My cat sees them too. Make them stop!
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The.heat.is.killing.me.
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Insomnia and cyclic drinking binges.
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-half of my friends are ignorant rich pricks who will never... ugh i dont even want to go there. i dont blame them. its not their fault...
-i recently ran into my dear from middle school. i moved out of town and didnt see her for 5 years and a half. we stopped talking a year after i moved. while chatting with her, i realized all of the girls ive dated have been similar to her in one way or another. i wonder if its because i still like her or because i just like certain kind of women. -my huge birthday party is coming up on the 11th of august. i dont think i ever wanted a huge bash... and i feel like im doing it to please others. i feel like i have a "title" to keep up with. so much stress. this might be my last event for a while... its certainly lost all of its fun (to me). i mean, the money is great and it makes me feel really good when everyone else is having fun... but i dont know. i think im over it. i just want to have a quiet dinner with my parents and my girl and 3-4 friends. its a little too late to stop though. i kinda feel like Guido in 8 1/2. Except im not making a movie, im organizing an event... and im very confused. its a little too late to cancel... but then again i think of the advice the writer gives guido... "It's better to destroy than create what's unnecessary" -confusion confusion confusion |
I'm horribly out of the loop.
"Event?" Money? Explain this occupational socializing, if you would be so kind. Every time I see your signature I think "molested ostrich." |
Also, Porky darling, did I garner from some thread or another that you've been seeing someone? Lewd details please (if there are none, fabricate them for my enertainment and/or voyeuristic pleasure).
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im an event coordinator/promoter ive thrown a couple of themed parties tickets range from 50-250 per guy (depending on the scale of the event) *guys get to bring 1-3 dates. get anywhere from 250-500 guys and usually double the girls i mean, it was fun and all but im kind of tired of seeing all the same sluts wearing the same slutty outfits girls not respecting themselves has been bothering me lately cause women are SO much better than that. i hope. |
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I'm sure no one gave a rat's ass. I wouldn't. So he's staying in Australia then? Met anyone worthwhile? Quote:
On the women and self-respect issue - I'm with you. While principally it's no better, I've found myself resorting to the scumbag look. Collectively, the chick sex has become pod-like in appearance (and, for that matter, attitude). I suspect the majority of women truly believe that if they step foot into a bar without highlighted hair, a manufactured tan, and an acceptably-trendy-yet-revealing-tit-shirt-that-screams-I'm-so-hot-my-body-rejects-cotton-like-silicone-implants, they will immediately implode. Or they won't get hit on. Which is FAR more tragic. I refuse to tailor my aesthetic to blend in with every other mindless chick whose life ambition is to be mistaken for having stepped out of an Urban Outfitters catalogue. I'm just too goddamned lazy. True to my typically judgemental and bitchy nature, I make the blanket statement that women are malleable imbeciles with either too much groomed personality or no personality whatsoever. I think on some psychological level, however deeply buried it may be, women's concept of self-worth is based almost entirely on peer (male) approval. |
sigh.
I guess that I just don't know. sometimes, for a split second, i wish i could be a junkie so i could spike my veins and run away from my problems. just for a split second. |
The guy downstairs from me is playing shit music very loud. I want to kill him, but instead I will have a bath and go out. It's too nice a day to be indoors anyway, so maybe I should really be thanking him instead of plotting his imminent death.
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it bothers me that i´m just awake for half an hour and i´m already smoking my 4th cigarette.
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Lee was logged on till a few seconds ago,and i did not post a "when the fu*k are you playing in italy?" thread fast enough....
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You do know; you're just too spineless to take action. It's obviously tiring you, keeping up an appearance of sorts. In most cases, the best option is to go with your first impulse. Fuck off your birthday party. Now THAT'S creating a reputation. Really though, look at it practically - you're going to force yourself to keep up a routine that is beginning to tax you, all to appease OTHER people? What exactly will you gain from this? You'll show up to these soirees, have a mediocre time at best, make attempts to deny your feelings of superficiality afterwards, and after all that, no one will really give a fuck whether you showed up or not (this is not to insinuate that you are unimportant to others; merely that you have already established a reputation/character of sorts, and that will remain in people's minds, regardless of whether you miss a gathering or two). It's very clear-cut - do you want to go, or not? If the answer is the latter, then you're being rather misguidedly selfless, and appeasing superficial transients. Cut yourself some slack, and go with your instincts, however bland they may seem. In summary - fuck everyone, because humanity generally sucks apesack. |
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I've just recieved a mailing at work, from Traidcraft. The parcel contains samples of Christmas cards. Christmas cards. They think it's a good idea for us to start displaying the sample cards and collecting customer orders. In July. In a heatwave. Christmas cards. Apart from the obvios prolem e it's f***ing daft, it also seems especially disrespectful to the supposed sanctity of Chistmas since Traidcraft are a Christian orgnistion. I wonder if any fairtrade outlets will actaully follow this through. Christmas cards. If you ask me it's further proof, as if it were needed.
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my Dad is pissing me off, he offers to help me pay for college fee's and the when its time to deliver the €€'s he starts all these very unessassary arguments which only come when a man has to part with cash...
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My longing to get out of this fucking place.
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